(Sorry to make this long, I hope it helps) >... I guess my question is how do you accept the inevitable? Do I take >her to the vet and put her down or do I just let it happen at home? What >would you do? How do I accept this all? I really don't know how to say >"Good-bye." ... Oh Margie I am so sorry to hear about Pookie. This is a huge decision and don't beat yourself up for having difficulty making it. I don't think any of us can give you a clear cut answer about how to handle this. Here are my suggestions for you. To determine if you should select euthanasia or not ask yourself the following question: Is Pookie suffering (i.e. in pain)? In my opinion, if an animal's situation is fatal and they are in pain than yes, look at having her euthanised. If you've got a good vet this is the best option. Other than a tiny "pinch" of a needle, she won't feel anything, she'll just fall asleep and then pass over the bridge. It's very fast and unstressful. If she is just getting more and more lethargic, but otherwise appears "comfortable" when she is awake then it is okay to consider letting her pick her own time. Things to watch for to determine her level of suffering (since animals tend to disguise pain) include: Is she eating at all? Can she make it to the litter box on her own? Does she respond to other ferrets or you? As far as how you can handle it first realize that being very upset and confused about this is NORMAL. Second, if you feel you need extra support for yourself try calling your local SPCA to find out if there is a "pet loss support group" in your area (your vet may also know of one). I haven't participated with one of these groups myself, but I think they can also help you come to terms with whether or not it is time to give Pookie assistance over the bridge. Things that have helped me in the past when I've gone through grief times. Writing poetry and letters and journals "to get it out of my system". It doesn't matter if you burn these 2 minutes after you write them, it's the act of expressing your feelings in a constructive matter. Writing a goodbye letter/poem to Pookie (no matter what route to the rainbow bridge you decide to let her take) and reading it to her will also help. Don't worry about your grammar or writing skills--this is just for you. Expect to go through "intense" grief for a while after she is gone. It is normal and healthy. You'll have good days and bad days. Gradually you'll have more good days as time passes. Some people get over the worst in a matter of weeks, some take months or years. We all handle this in our own way and at our own pace. One day at a time. All my love to you during this difficult time. Lorraine [Posted in FML issue 3672]