The First Ferret Thanksgiving Big Chief and The Head Pilgrim sat under a tree discussing the guest list for the first Thanksgiving Dinner. They agreed upon all the guests-except the Ferret Family. The Head Pilgrim wanted to invite them, but Big Chief crossed his arms and said, "NO! No Fert!" Not wanting to cause an International Incident, The Head Pilgrim decided not to press the issue. He would invite the Ferret Family without Big Chief knowing it ...and surely when they showed up for the celebration, Big Chief would realize it was the right thing to do. It was to be a grand celebration and everyone should have the chance to join in the fun! The Head Pilgrim made special invitations for everyone that read: "Please come and join us in giving thanks for our new homes, our bountiful harvest and our new friends. A wonderful feast will be served including Turkey, Stuffing, Mashed Potatoes, Gravy, Cranberry Sauce and much more!" The day of the event arrived and Indians, Animals and Pilgrims alike all gathered for the feast. Big Chief and The Head Pilgrim were drooling over the spread that lay before them when Big Chief spotted the Ferret Family be-bopping toward the table. His eyes got huge and he said, "NO! No Fert!" Father Ferret boinked up to The Head Pilgrim and raising to stand on his hind legs said, " I want to, dook, thank you, kind sir, for inviting us to such a fine, dook, event-it's not often we, dook, get invited out.... so this, dook, means a great deal to us, dook, dook!" "Just happy you could attend, my furry friend. Now please, you and your family be our guest and help yourself to this fine feast," said the Head Pilgrim. Big Chief cringed. In the next instant, the table was covered with ferrets. Big ferrets, little ferrets, white ferrets, brown ferrets. Ferrets with mitts and ferrets with blazes. "Hey....where's the gravy?" Ferrets with big ears and ferrets with pointy noses. There were ferrets in the turkey and ferrets in the stuffing. "Hey....where's the gravy?" Ferrets rolling cranberries between their legs....and someone stole the Horn of Plenty! Whipped cream for the pumpkin pie disappeared in a flash and-oops, there's a drumstick being dragged under the table! "Hey....where's the gravy?" The milk was spilled, the corn was scattered, and boink, doink.....the rolls rolled so well! "But hey....where's the gravy?" Big Chief looked at The Head Pilgrim, shook his head and said, "NO! No Ferts!" Then he motioned to his braves and they all retreated back into the forest(-still hungry, I might add!) One by one, the animal families followed, until no one remained but a family of happy, fat ferrets. The Head Pilgrim could not help but laugh at the mess before him. Now he understood why The Big Chief had not wanted the Ferret Family to attend. As he bent to pick up an empty bowl from the ground, the Father Ferret... with traces of whipped cream on his whiskers and potatoes on his paws, came up to him and said, "This is, dook, the best feast we have ever had! Thank you so much for inviting us! Everything was, dook, so delicious, dook, dook. But....where, dook, was the gravy?" he asked. "The Gravy?" asked The Head Pilgrim. "I think this was the gravy," he said as he held out the empty bowl in his hand. As Father Ferret and family started to bebop back into the forest, he stopped and turned to The Head Pilgrim and said, "Next year, dook, I'll bring the gravy, dook, dook.....Bob Church's Chicken Gravy! Dook, dook! Happy Thanksgiving! Judy Cooke Tyson, Hope and Einstein Precious Lily, Chaucer and Boomer! [Posted in FML issue 3609]