Dear FML, I had no idea I'd feel like this. Garcia is now gone and even though he is with someone very loving towards him with many new brothers and sisters, I feel empty. The lady that picked him up seemed angry with me...or maybe I was looking in a mirror of myself. I am angry at myself for giving him up, for not being strong enough to deal with him. I love him so much. I feel like this terrible terrible ferret owner. I love my ferrets to death. I want only the best for them. I don't expect any sympathy, but just want people to understand that I did only what I thought was the best for he and us. I will be in tears for while I suppose. I will remember the new mommy's expression towards me. This "how could you give him up although I'm glad I have him" look Well, if it had been the other way around, I would have been judgmental too. I suppose she was nervous too about if and when I was goin to break down. We made the meeting short, or at least I did because I was about to and didn't want to put that on her. Well, that concludes my time with Garcia. Please pray for him to have a good healthy time with his new home and for me and my husband to move on knowing we did the right thing for him and us. peace, Julia [Posted in FML issue 3563]