Joe has learned to spring the cage. Of all the ferrets, JOE has learned to open the cage. Now, Joe is a sweet, sweet little tubby weasel. He has the most innocent little personality. Butter wouldn't melt in his mouth and he would have no interest at all in smearing it around the kitchen, across the floor, under the sofa and to the hidey hole like the other kids would. Joe is a perfect gentleman, always well-mannered and orderly, but a few grapes short of a fruit salad, if you know what I mean. And Joe has learned to spring the cage. Of course, being the weasel that he is, he always comes straight off to tell me that it's morning, he's opened the cage and will now be off to get his morning chores done, thank you very much. The others would all be out rampaging. Joe has to wish me a good morning. So a few mornings ago, my "mom radar" goes off and I wake up at 7am to hear what can only be Joe working at the cage. No problem, I thought. With the dog clip on the door, he can't get out. I snooze back off, only to awake to the sound of galloping paws and a cold nose poked in my general direction. I take him back to the cage to find it still locked and secured with the dog clip. All the other kids are still snoring in their hammocks. Hmmmm.... The next night I made sure to securely clip the door and added twist ties on the sides to make extra sure Joe would stay where put until a reasonable hour of the morning. So I was confident at seven the next morning that I had completely Joe-proofed the cage and that for all his workings he was fine. Twenty minutes later, there's Joe kissing me good morning and dancing across the room to check on the Stuffed-Toys-Under-the-Draperies. The clips and twist-ties were exactly where I had left them, firmly attached to the cage door. At this point all I can figure is that he's wedging his head through the gap between cage wire and door wire and wiggling his way to freedom. Nevermind that it's a mere 1/4" different from all the rest of the wire on the very securely made Superpets ferret-proof cage. Nevermind that Joe tops out at 3.7 pounds. Somehow the little houdini is springing the cage. So this morning, Saturday morning, when logically I should get to sleep to heaven knows when, what am I doing but crawling out of bed at 7am to secretly watch Joe work in an effort to foil his little plans. Poor, poor Joe. The cage door last night was double dog clipped and double twist tied. Federal banks are less secure. So at the crack of dawn this morning Joe worked and worked and worked. He bit the cage wires and rattled the door firmly. He dug and dug at the wire, reaching through with little fuzzy toes. He strained to pull and push the wire so he could get his head through. Frighteningly enough, he only worked at the door joints, the only two places that would aid his escape. He also managed to strip one twist tie off and fling it across the cage. This was no fluke- he was actively working at the twist tie. Scary. At some point in this process, he started rolling over. You must understand that Joe rolls over when he really wants something. He absolutely refuses to do it on command, but if there is something he desperately wants, there's Joe rolling and rolling and rolling. So Joe works for a bit then rolls frantically, works for a bit, rolls frantically. No good. After ten minutes or so, poor Joe gives up, climbs back to his bed, morosely rolls into a ball and shuts his eyes. Good, I thought. He's realized his defeat. Back to bed for me. Twenty minutes later he's back at it. I get back up and crouch in the doorway to watch. More working and desperate rolling. Ten minutes later he goes back to bed. We repeated this scenario four times with Joe finally adding double rolls for good measure. Nothing's working. His magic powers are fading. Whatever is a poor weasel to do?! Like any good weasel he finally gave up to have a bit of breakfast and to toss food and water around the cage. When I finally re-awoke (at a decent hour of the morning!), Joe had crashed hard. He blinked one eye at me when I let the other kids out and stayed firmly entrenched in his blankets. Apparently the Stuffed Toys only call for him at 7am. Go figure. So as it stands now, Ferret proofing-one, Fuzzie- zero. It can't last... Anne and the little minions of chaos [Posted in FML issue 3367]