Ferrets can talk. It's just that some people haven't learned how to listen. Scene: my kitchen early afternoon. Cast: Nala, an almost 8 year old ferret; Joan, my wife; me, just me. I'm standing near the kitchen island talking to Joan. Nala runs up to me, taps me on the top of my foot. When I look down, she runs over to the basement door and looks back at me. ME: "Sorry Nala, you can't go down in the basement by yourself. I'll be going down later and I'll take you, but there's too many things you can get into there." JOAN: looks at me strangely. NALA: Runs over and taps the top of my foot again. She looks up, licks her chops and tilts her head to the side. ME: "OK, I guess I can give you a treat. Ferret Bites OK?" JOAN: "Are you trying to tell me that Nala is talking to you?" NALA: Runs over to the book shelf where I usually line up her treats for her. ME: "Certainly. She just asked me for a treat and I told her I'd get her some." JOAN: Shakes her head sadly while I open the cabinet, get the treats and place them on the shelf. NALA: after eating a couple Ferret Bites runs over to me again, taps my foot, looks up and backs away. ME: "You want water? I guess those treats can make you thirsty. OK, I'll get you a bowl." JOAN: "Now I KNOW you're putting me on. Ferrets DON'T TALK! People get hospitalized for saying things like that." ME: getting bowl, filling it with water. JOAN: "Nala doesn't WANT water." ME: "Nala asked for a drink of water. She said she was thirsty." NALA: Starts lapping the water as soon as I set it down. JOAN: "I don't know who's crazier; Nala, you, or me for almost believing you. Ferrets CAN talk. Some people just haven't learned to listen. Yet. Dick B. [Posted in FML issue 3335]