I will not nip my mommy's toes, In the early morning hours, I will not "organize" her tapes, Or "help" arrange her flowers. I will not hide her new high heels, Or put tooth marks on the toes, And now I know that 2 AM's No time for "kisses" on the nose. Mommy's books aren't for my teeth, And toilet paper's not for me, And mommy really didn't like my litter-digging spree. I promise to be very good, And do all that I oughter, And never ever try to see, Why fishes live in water, I promise that my antics, Were never meant to harm, My enthusiastic love of life, Is one of my many charms... Most of all, my mommy dear, I promise this to you, My love for you will never fail, I promise that is true. [Posted in FML issue 3169]