I have had so many of my crew here decide that they taught me all they can and loved me all they can so it was time fo them to move on to the bridge. So many of you have let me know that your thoughts and prayers are with me. Even when I confessed that I felt that I was partially responsible for Buddy's death because I did not get him to the vet in time. I just put it off to long. You are all trully wonderful and caring. As a shelter operator, there is little time in the day left to do anything extra once all the cages are cleaned and fuzzies loved on. I am so looking forward to the day when they have their own room and I do not have to juggle their out of cage time with the rest of the household schedule. I have asked God to give me just a bit of a break in my sorrow. Both my heart and my budget need desperatly to heal. It seems that I am losing half of bonded pairs so I am trying to be especially keen to their needs. It has been about 5 days since I lost Buddy and his cage mate Rosie is still tearing apart her cage and flinging food all over the place. She looks lost in her bed by herself and almost seems to eye me suspiciously when I take her out for some cuddle time. She has started to eat again but the look on her face is akin to betrayal. Thank you so much for your kind words. They do help the healing process. Diana and The Ferret Farm [Posted in FML issue 3048]