Hi all, I lost my 8.5 year old little guy, Scamp, just over two weeks ago. It's taken me this long to write about it, as I've found this loss particularly difficult to cope with. It is always so devastating losing one of our beloved fuzzies, but this one for me has been so sad. Scamp had adrenal cancer. He had it for some time before the symptoms really started showing. He was finally diagnosed, but since Scamp was so old, and not a good candidate for surgery, we opted for Lupron shots to help his enlarged prostate, and Mitotane to kill off the tumor. Scamp did improve with the treatment, but unfortunately, the cancer won. Scamp was a walking skeleton for the last 2 weeks of his life. I took the week off work before we took Scamp into the vet to have him euthanized. He needed help during that week to get to his water, and be fed, and I needed to be there with him for myself. It was so difficult to watch my little guy deteriorate day by day, but he still had the will to live. I knew the day he needed help to go to the Bridge. His eyes told me. I still don't know how the receptionist at the vet understood my words through my sobbing, and trying to tell her I needed to take Scamp in so they could euthanize him. On the way up to the vet's, I had my hand on Scamp through his cage's open door. I knew these were the last few minute that I could touch and comfort him. I wasn't in the room when they gave Scamp the shot. Before the shot, they put him in a little chamber to give him gas and put him out, and then gave him the shot. I was outside the vet's office with my wonderful man, Jim, and we were both bawling our eyes out. I took Scamp's body home, to show my remaining ferrets. Shreddy, who dearly loved Scamp, gave his body a sniff, the proceeded to *look* for him. It was like she knew that what I showed her was Scamp's beautiful little shell, and she was looking for his soul. When I showed Finnigan and Scrumpy. they both curled up beside Scamp's still-warm body, and tried to bed down to sleep with it. It was heart-breaking. Jim and I took Scamp's body to Devonian Park. It is a wild park, and I used to walk Scamp, and his brother, Bear, there every weekend. We buried Scamp's body by the creek that he loved to drink from. It was nice. I've lost ferrets before, and it's always been devastating, but losing Scamp has been particularly difficult. He is one of my original ferrets. I rescued Bear and Scamp about 7 years ago, and when Bear died 2 years ago, Scamp and I grew a very close bond. Scamp slept with me every night, and he constantly followed me around the house when I got home from work. He "put up" with the other wonderful fuzzies I have rescued, but I was always his mum. Thanks so much for listening. Good-bye, my precious little angel Scamp. Linda, (Angel Scamp), Shreddy, Finnigan and Scrumpy [Posted in FML issue 3033]