Hi everyone Dumpy has crossed the bridge three weeks ago, it feels like forever and yesterday, i haven't been able to write about him, i'm still crying as i write this, i feel like i have lost a child, i hope nobody is offended by me saying so, but he was my baby, and as close to my heart as any human being could possibly be. I adopted Dumpy a year and a half ago, he was so skinny and bony and weighed less than a pound, i syringe fed him every 3 hours untill he regained his apetite and normal weight, and we continued feeding him his chicken gravy through out his life every 4 hours, my husband and i would argue over who'sturn it was to feed Dumpy as we both loved to sit with him on our lap enjoying his meal, he was just the sweetest and most wonderful ferret on earth, it's imposible to imagine why anyone would have wanted to throw him in a dumpster, he had a lions heart in this tiny little body even though he wasn't so tiny :) we loved to watch his explosions of joy when he would roll around on the floor with his mouth wide open as if he was laughing and grinning of happiness, He was the first thing on my mind when i woke up in the mornings and the last before i went to bed, he was the sunshine of my life, and every moment we had together was so precious to me. he had so many problems, his spleen was removed which i think caused him to eventually become very anemic, but his attitude to life was impressive, he would lay on his back just being cute in front of the tv at night so that we could admire and love him, he knew just how special he was to us and i know he ejoyed knowing what power he had over us. he had lymphoma and insulinoma, but the way he acted you would never have known there was anything wrong with him, but the last coupple of months i knew Dumpy was getting tired, and the last week i knew he was in pain, i tried to make him as comfortable as i could, but we knew he was slipping away. When he started to cry everytime he had to poop, his vet told me it was time, it was the hardest decission i ever have had to make, but my Dumpy deserved the best i could do for him. i made a promise to him that i would never let anything or anyone hurt him ever again, and i could not bare to watch him suffer, i was able to stay with him while he took his last breath, and he went peacefully, my heart was breaking during this procedure, but there was no way Dumpy was going to be by himself these last moments of his life. I'm crying as i write this, and my heart is breaking, i'm having the hardest time dealing with the loss of Dumpy and my other ferrets right now, and i don't know if anything makes any sense anymore, i feel liek i've lost the best part of me and i will never be the same again. HIs autopsy revealed that he had a malignant tumor on his right adrenal that had grown in to hte vena cava, and all the surrounding tissue was discoloured and damaged, his heart was slightly enlarged, there was nothing his vet could have done, and he felt we had done the right thing. i will never stop wondering if there was something else i could have done, but in my heart i feel that Dumpy was spared alot of pain. Dumpy was cremated and his remains are here with me, but it is so empty without him, everything in this house and everything i do reminds me of him and i miss him so much. I hope that he is at the bridge, i hope there was somebody that he loved there to meet him, i hope he can feel how much i love him and always will love him. he will forever be in my heart, he will forever be the best part of me. Please Sandee, let me know that he is ok, i feel like i haven't been able to give my other fuzzies the love and attention they need, i can't stop missing my Dumpy man. Sincerely Josephine visit Dumpy and the guys at www.zyworld.com/josephinehansen/ferrethome.htm=20 [Posted in FML issue 3027]