Help!! The new kid, Bear, has taken to eating socks!! Miesa is stealing and hiding them and Bear is eating huge holes in them! Not only is this bad in the event that I might want to wear matching socks at some point (since now I have NONE), the whole intestinal blockage thing could be a problem. I've been dosing him up on the herbal laxative goop and watching the poop for signs of stress. So far we're good. But what do I do?!!! Even though I am faithful to pull the dirty socks off and put them on the top shelf, there is always a stray floating around somewhere. Is there something I can wash them in? Is this a sign of deeper emotional stress in my newest baby? Did I mention he's also tried stealing the socks while they're STILL ON MY FEET?!! If I didn't outweigh him by a couple zillion pounds I'd be shoved under the dresser and full of holes by now. Wow... what a diet that would be. Anyway... please help! I can keep buying new socks for me, but the blockage thing really scares me. Speaking of poop ( we were speaking of poop, weren't we?), I have found the niftiest new toy. I am now the proud owner of a Dirt Devil Easy Steamer vacuum thingy. Sucks the ferret poop and assorted stains right outta my carpet. Maybe I will get the apartment deposit back after all. Comes with corner attachments and everything. Who needs to clean anything but the corners anyway? Of course watching the ferrets zing across the floor and burst into the " Oooo, aaagghhh, wet floor" dance is entirely worth the purchase price. My revenge, I suppose, for the times they don't find a corner and I walk through the house in the middle of the night. Ick. Wessi Taz, Miesa, Joe and Bear [Posted in FML issue 2995]