I just wanted to thank Renee for her post in yesterdays FML, particularly
the section on flames.
 
Personally, I can understand the *why* of people wanting to send private
flames to the list, but I do agree with Renee.  Bill does not allow flames
through to the list, and will not forward on posts without the original
posters permission, so they wouldn't be posted, but they would still have
the power to detroy the list.  Personally, I know full well that I would
never be able to handle the work that he does on the FML.  He has to siphon
through all the dirt, mud, blood and tears to find the diamond hidden
within.  Many posts - especially in an emotionally charged time, such as
holidays, etc or when something unusual (the Kodo situation, Spokane
massacre, Tiffany, Modern Ferret Halloween issue etc) comes out - are hate-
filled personal attacks.  Bill has to go through these and send each one
back to the person who wrote them with a reason as to why they cannot be
posted.  Some people who have received these individual notes have taken an
affront to the suggestion that they may need to rewrite their post so that
it adheres to the FML rules, and attack Bill for doing his job.  I don't
know how he manages to keep his cool not only in a single situation, but on
a daily basis - every day of the year since he took on this responsibility.
I can't imagine how he copes with the situation as it is now, let alone
heaping flames on him in hopes that he can mediate.
 
Regarding double standards... in some way there does seem to be a double
standard.  In the case of some pregnant people being supported and others
being reamed out, I personally believe the difference is that the reaming
out of the one that was 'supported' happened in private.  When the person
complained to the list as a result, the other people came forward to
support the person concerned.  In cases where all that is seen is the
'reaming' I personally believe that people who believe otherwise probably
just didn't say anything different from the 'current opinion' because it's
just darned hard to post something contrary to 'popular opinion'!  There
are three thousand people on this list, and a vast majority never post 'in
public'.  A lot of the way people respond here is governed by the way a
post is originally written.  For instance, if someone posts that they've
been fighting to find a way to keep their ferrets since their old landlord
sold the building they live in and the new landlord refuses to honour the
contract allowing the ferrets, many will respond with ways to help to
rehome the ferrets, or arrange to board them until the owners find a new
place to stay.  Yet, if the very same situation came up and someone says
they have to get rid of their ferrets because of the landlord, they'll have
half a dozen people jump on them publicly and more privately.  The way
things are worded makes a big difference, and people who aren't that good
with words can have a hard time, especially at first.
 
Sam
[Posted in FML issue 2880]