Okay, all...here's another chance to educate.
I listen to a radio talk show called Dr. Laura. If you've heard of it, you
either love it or hate it. She's a radio psychologist and is extremely
moral...like almost too moral (but is that bad??) But anyway, she's hard to
take. I hated her for weeks then I was hooked. I find it entertaining.
Anyway. For a long time, when she refers to "bad" people she often
(jokingly) called them "gerbils." She really has no beef about gerbils, but
she thought it "sounded" like a good analogy. Well, gerbil people wrote to
her and told her that she needed to pick a new animal, because it turns out
that gerbils are very loving mothers, they are monogomous, and the fathers
participate in gerbil-rearing. So, she decided they set a good example and
now she won't be calling "bad" people gerbils anymore. Now she's looking
for a new animal to use as her "bad people" animal. (Understand, this is a
lighthearted thing...she's known to not particularly like cats, but she
doesn't slander them. She likes dogs. But in a light sense, she just wants
to be able to say "well, since he walked out on you and your kids, he was
just a <insert name of animal>.... don't go ballistic on her for doing that.
That isn't my issue here...)
So anyway. I knew this was going to come up. After she announced that she
needed a new animal to use as example, someone faxed her and said that she
should consider ferrets. Apparently this woman (who faxed) had a ferret in
college. Thought it was cute, bought it, took it home. Showered it with
love, blah blah blah. Then she found out that the ferret smelled bad, it
only showed love when it wanted something, it stole things and put them all
over the house, and took fancy when this woman was sitting on the couch to
sneak out and bite her on the 'backside', so the fax said. So Dr. Laura
read that fax and said the ferret is a possible replacement for gerbil.
Then she read two other faxes, one saying to use weasels, and the other was
some kind of bird that apparently lays its eggs then doesn't care for its'
young.
Understand...she's looking to use an animal that exhibits immoral behavior,
like not caring for young, not being monogomous, etc. etc. (Again, I know
how queer this sounds!!!) So, here we go folks. If we inundate her with
faxes, she WILL address it on the show (she might make fun of us, too, but
I think she'll put us in a good light for being unified in our cause). The
only reason I bring it up is that we might get the chance to have ferrets
mentioned...publicity. She does actually read some faxes on the air...she
won't read our fax, distort it, then just summarize one-sided on the show.
(She's against "gossip" -- she always deals in FACT). That might be an
angle to fax her with... "I know that you are big on NOT gossiping, that you
believe in FACT. For that reason you can't use the ferret as a substitute
for the gerbil, because you will be spreading misinformation about
ferrets..." That kind of thing. Tell her about the fight that we are
fighting to spread the TRUTH about ferrets. Another clincher....she's in
California. Good plug for the California situation.
I hope you all understand what I'm suggesting. Do not fax her with anything
rude....approach it as though you want to EDUCATE her, that she never would
want to mis-classify the ferret as an immoral animal (use humor if you
like...might get your fax read on the air). It might be a good idea to
listen to her show for one day before you fax her (if you can deal with
her).
Thing is, how do we present the ferret? Well, let's see...the angle that
they are good mothers just WON'T fly....ask Sammy in New Zealand...her
Slinky keep stuffing one of her babies in this tiny little hole so that she
can get away from him!!!! Not to mention they often eat their babies... so
we should avoid that angle (we don't want to say something that's not true).
We COULD say that ferrets form such strong bonds that if they lose their
bond-mate, whether it's a human bond or a cagemate bond, that they can
suffer extreme depression, get sick, stop eating...this IS true. That's a
good angle. I want to get her faxed ASAP...I'd also like us all to fax her
on the same day (that would be SURE to get her to mention us on the air).
So, let's put up ideas on the FML over the weekend, and we can fax her on
Monday. I hereby announce that Monday, 3/16 is FAX DR. LAURA day. Let's
try to keep each of our faxes one page or less (she won't read them all if
they're too long). So everyone, post your ideas on what to fax her,
remember our goal is just to get some education out there. If she reads any
of our faxes on the air, it should serve to educate the millions that listen
to her show (she does have a big following).
Any takers? Come on, it's FREE PUBLICITY!!! (Plus, we don't want her
calling cheating drunken husbands "ferrets" on the show). It will make a
difference...she educated ME about gerbils....
Her fax number is: 818-461-5140 but again, let's all do this on Monday,
3/16!
Her website (if you want to learn more about her to gear your fax to her,
or to find out what local station she's on so you can listen to her) is
http://www.drlaura.com. She's on for three hours a day, but at different
times all over the place. Find a station that she's on and call them to
find out what time.
Let me say this again, though... if we write to her ANGRY for this, she will
not put ferrets in a good light. That's just how she is...defensive, I
guess. We have to write it in a positive light.
One more thing...if ANYONE out there is home during the day and would be
willing to tape her show for a few days after we all fax her, will you
volunteer? I'm at work when she's on, and I can't tape her, and there's a
good chance I'll miss it if she mentions us. E-mail me privately if you can
find a station that she's on and you can tape her, let's say, Monday through
Wednesday or Thursday.
I hope we all do this!
Kymberlie Becker Barone
Director, Pennsylvania Ferret Rescue Association
"Forget Puppy Love...There's nothing Greater than Ferret Love!" TM
http://home.sprynet.com/sprynet/ferretlady
[Posted in FML issue 2244]
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