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From:
"Tara C. Radford" <[log in to unmask]>
Date:
Sun, 9 May 2004 08:19:41 -0700
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This os one of the truest,most Beautiful things i have ever read....
There are a few of you here you aren't Moms to humanoids yet or maybe
never will, but if nothing else,no truer words were EVER spoken.Think
of your own Mom..
 
Think of your animals.A Mom is a Mom be it 2 legs or 4..... I have those
same maternal feelings for my ferrets;) I know some of you have lost your
Moms.For you i truly grieve.  When i was 2 weeks late in my giving birth
to Ryan,my son....the Dr looked at my anxious face,took my hand and said
"Tara,please do not be in a hurry...this is the last time you will ever
be alone,relish it!" Little did either of us know,i didn't want to ever
be alone again.Motherhood is the single hardest thing you will ever do
but the rewards far out weight the heartache (eventually,lol;)
 
Ryan,Vivian,BabEE,my sweet babys on CMF (Jenn,Sherrie,Staci) and alllllll
my 15 ferrets either with me or in Heaven,I LOVE you with all my Heart &
soul;)
 
Thank you for Blessing my life;)
Your Mom,
Me;)
 
 
Happy Mother's Day!
 
We are sitting at lunch one day when my daughter casually mentions that
she and her husband are thinking of "starting a family."  "We're taking
a survey," she says half-joking.  "Do you think I should have a baby?"
 
"It will change your life," I say, carefully keeping my tone neutral.
 
"I know," she says, "no more sleeping in on weekends, no more spontaneous
vacations."
 
But that is not what I meant at all.  I look at my daughter, trying to
decide what to tell her.  I want her to know what she will never learn
in child birth classes.  I want to tell her that the physical wounds of
child bearing will heal, but becoming a mother will leave her with an
emotional wound so raw that she will forever be vulnerable.
 
I consider warning her that she will never again read a newspaper without
asking, "What if that had been MY child?" That every plane crash, every
house fire will haunt her.  That when she sees pictures of starving
children, she will wonder if anything could be worse than watching your
child die.
 
I look at her carefully manicured nails and stylish suit and think that
no matter how sophisticated she is, becoming a mother will reduce her to
the primitive level of a bear protecting her cub.  That an urgent call
of "Mom!" will cause her to drop a soufflE or her best crystal without
a moment's hesitation.
 
I feel that I should warn her that no matter how many years she has
invested in her career, she will be professionally derailed by
motherhood.  She might arrange for child-care, but one day she will
be going into an important business meeting and she will think of her
baby's sweet smell.  She will have to use every ounce of discipline to
keep from running home, just to make sure her baby is all right.
 
I want my daughter to know that every day decisions will no longer be
routine.  That a five year old boy's desire to go to the men's room
rather than the women's at McDonald's will become a major dilemma.  That
right there, in the midst of clattering trays and screaming children,
issues of independence and gender identity will be weighed against the
prospect that a child molester may be lurking in that toilet.
 
However decisive she may be at the office, she will second-guess herself
constantly as a mother.  Looking at my attractive daughter, I want to
assure her that eventually she will shed the pounds of pregnancy, but;
she will never feel the same about herself.  That her life, now so
important, will be of less value to her once she has a child.  That she
would give up in a moment to save her offspring, but will also begin to
hope for more years, not to accomplish her own dreams, but to watch her
child accomplish theirs.
 
I want her to know that a caesarean scar or shiny stretch marks will
become badges of honor.
 
My daughter's relationship with her husband will change, but not in the
way she thinks.  I wish he could understand how much more you can love a
man who is careful to powder the baby or who never hesitates to play with
his child.  I think she should know that she will fall in love with him
again for reasons she would now find very unromantic.
 
I wish my daughter could sense the bond she will feel with women
throughout history who have tried to stop war, prejudice and drunk
driving.  I hope she will understand why I can think rationally about
most issues, but become temporarily insane when I discuss the threat
of nuclear war to my children's future.
 
I want to describe to my daughter the exhilaration of seeing your child
learn to ride a bike.  I want to capture for her the belly laugh of a
baby who is touching the soft fur of a dog or cat for the first time.  I
want her to taste the joy that is so real it actually hurts.
 
My daughter's quizzical look makes me realize that tears have formed in
my eyes.
 
"You'll never regret it," I finally say.  Then I reached across the
table, squeezed my daughter's hand and offered a silent prayer for her,
and for me, and for all the mere mortal women who stumble their way
into this most wonderful of callings.
 
Please share this with a Mom that you know or all of your girlfriends
who may someday be Moms.
 
They say, "It takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to
appreciate them, a day to love them, but an entire lifetime to forget
them"  If God brings you to it....He will bring you through it.
[Posted in FML issue 4508]

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