Got to thinking back about the woman pleading with a mother of a young
child to please not send in or to recall her video film of her ferret
biting her child's nose.  It was on the FML some time back - can't find y
it now; not enough time - but simply the kid's mother thought this was a
really comical happening and told the FML that she had or was thinking of
sending it in to one of these "Funniest Video" programs.
 
The second woman was aghast at this and moaned and pleaded with the mother
to get it back before it was shown on nationwide TV.
 
Anybody know what happened eventually?
 
Two thoughts on this: 1.) Does this now reinstate Jack Hanna in the minds
of those of you who on this FML just couldn't get enough satisfaction in
villifying this man because he stated on nationwide TV that the DOMESTICAL*
ferret was simply not a good pet for everybody?  Common now; you as well as
I know he stated an obvious truth.  Wasn't this truth exemplified in the TV
Funniest Video debacle cited above?
 
To each of you I would suggest that you offer in this medium a profound
apology for lambasting this man, Jack Hanna.  Have you got what it takes??
Hmmm?  Sure you do.
 
And to thought 2.) With respect to Bill Killian's portrayl of apparently
holding a ferret up to his kid's face, and being so proud of this
demonstration, Hey Bill, am I getting through to you man?  I would beg you,
in all that's decent and honest, please, please don't do that.  You are
sending a message to many people who respect you, and believe it or not, I
do, a message that holding a ferret up to a kid's face is perfectly OK FOR
EVERYBODY AND ALL FERRETS.
 
Those of us who are familiar with ferrets damn well know that some person,
sooner or later, seeing BK's portrayl of a ferret in a kid's face and
thinking it's just so "cute," will probably try the same gesture and WHAMO!
their kids gonna get nailed right on the schnozola.  Of course it'll be a
little too late then and another ferret gets stomped to death and/or the
kid may undergo a rabies shot series, not to mention the horror that will
forever live in that kid's mind.
 
Bill Killian: I'll get right down on my hands and knees and pray to God (or
in you case to Buddha) that you get rid of that depiction on your web page,
because much to your contrary opinion, you are doing more potential harm
to ferretdom than good.  Of course you mean well and your ferrets are pure
pussycats, I'm sure, but man - o - man you're sending bad vibes.
 
And speaking of your other picture on your web page ... the picture of your
beautiful wife to the left of the massive ferret(s) heads on the right, I
must say I am constantly amazed at the size of that giant ferret.  Golly,
comparison-wise, his head is just about half the size of your wife's head.
 
I suppose that is a giant ferret alright ... but you know, I can't help but
wonder if you've done a little, ah, well a little fudging there (I don't
want to say untruthful), but I just gotta ask you Bill, did you superimpose
two photos into one and not make that fact obvious to the public?  Huh?
 
OK Bill.  You be nice to me OK?
 
Edward Lipinski
 
Omne ignotum pro magnifico [L.] Everything unknown is assumed to be
something magnificant.
 
*DOMESTICAL and certainly not domesticated.  Why?  Simple.  Domestication
is a process and certainly not a completed state as the use of the term
"domesticatED" implies.  The ferret is constantly being retrained (each
from the time of their birth) as it is forced to interact with people who
are molding that ferret's behavior for their own pleasures (what we call
pure hedonism).  Perhaps cosmic ray bombardment of their genes and the
behavior pressure impressed upon those genes may play a role in the
"instinctive" behavior changes that are much too infinitesimal to even
measure, but the path to accelerated instinctive change and certainly
measurable domestication variances comes in quick time as a consequence of
selective breeding (eugenics - the super race matings of aristogenics) and
from genetic engineering.  (Hey!  don't go bonkers on me, this science was
around a long time before Hitler latched on to it)
 
[Moderator's note: I met one of their ferrets at a show a few years ago.
Probably the biggest ferret I've ever held and it was not yet fully grown.
So, no -- I don't think we're dealing with retouching here -- that was one
LARGE ferret!  BIG]
[Posted in FML issue 2570]