Hi folks,
 
It seems like every time I read any column about celebrities lately,
invariably it includes some mention of Ben Stiller's nightmarish
experience of a ferret biting his chin.  Fed up, I composed the following
email to Universal Studios, which is releasing the film.  If anyone would
like to similarly express their thoughts, the submission page for emails
is: http://www.universalstudios.com/homepage/html/contact_us/
 
Dear Universal Studios,
 
I was extremely dispapointed and insulted to read the widely-reported
remarks regarding Ben Stiller's experience with the ferret on the set
of "Along Came Polly".  His often-quoted remarks about how horrible the
ferret was (there are several million ferret owners in the United States;
they are the third most popular pet after cats and dogs, so obviously a
fair number of people do not find them "horrible" or "rat-like") are both
ignorant and ill-informed.
 
Additionally, the report that Mr. Stiller had to get a "rabies shot" has
shocked and dismayed me and, I suspect, lots of other ferret owners.
Ferrets kept as pets are can and should (and in many states are required
to) have annual rabies shots, just as a dog or cat.  What irresponsible
animal handler brought an unvaccinated animal to work with actors on a
movie set??  When Mr. Stiller was filimg "Something About Mary", did
someone just go pick a stray mutt off the street, or did they get a dog
that had had its rabies shot in case it bit Mr. Stiller?  It is no
different for the ferret, and whatever disregard was shown is the fault
of the animal handler, the production team, and Universal Studios, not
the animal.
 
In viewing the trailer for "Along Came Polly", there seems to be some
fairly rough handling of the ferret, which a reasonable person could
connect with the fact that it bit Mr. Stiller.  The scene he describes
when he was bitten is one where he was "running with the ferret".  Well,
a small animal like a ferret does not like to be picked up, held
inappropriately, and sprinted with.  An adequate and professional animal
handler - the kind that would presumably make sure an animal had rabies
shots before bringing it to a movie set - would know this.
 
Shame on you, Universal Studios, shame on your animal handler on this
film, and shame on Mr. Stiller for acting like such an enormous baby when
an animal simply followed its natural instinct and protested treatment it
did not like.  I will be sure to NOT spend my money to see your movie,
and to encourage friends, coworkers and family members to avoid it.  I
hope that the several million other ferret owners in this country do the
same.
 
-Heather Wojtowicz
 Ferret Owner
 Amherst, Massachusetts
[Posted in FML issue 4377]