For all who have lost their fur kids, my heart felt condolences.  With
this week I haven't had time to let many know how sorry I am.
 
Alix came to us 4 years ago.  She and her bonded mate, Bailey, were
advertised on the bulletin board at work: Two female ferrets, cage, free.
Need immediate home.  So I called, found out the gal who had them was
their 3rd home.  Alix was about 2, Bailey maybe three.  We met the new
owner, who hadn't even had them a week, at the boarding kennel and
brought them home.  Bailey was showing adrenal signs, Alix was deep in
depression.  I had Bailey's surgery maybe 4 months after they came to us,
and I lost her to a botched surgery.  Alix' depression worsened, but she
then bonded to Socks.  How do I describe Alix.  A non-Marshall farms
ferret, little Roman nose, silver mitt who detested having her tail
touched.  Two years old and she looked as though she were 9.  She never
talked, and I only saw her war dance maybe three times.  She was so
dignified that when she'd dance she'd suddenly stop, look around, shake
herself and walk off.  She'd play in the packing peanuts box, but never
with toys.  It took over a year for her to come out of her depression,
well over a year and a half to be able to see a carrying case and not
fall apart.  She became my little counselor for the new ones who'd join
our group, she never fought.  Others would pick on her, she'd yell and
I'd come running.  She loved to be scritched on the shoulders-she'd just
hunker that little body up, her eyes would close and she'd just stand
there.  Eventually she'd turn her head around and mouth your fingers in
a thank you.
 
When Socks left us Alix bonded to another group, and then she joined the
big group, never had any problems with any of them.  Joy might run by and
bounce off her, causing Alix to look shocked, someone might try to fight
with her, but she'd run and I'd be there.  She started getting extremely
itchy last fall, but no sign of adrenal.  In March she had a huge tumor
on her right ear, so when I had 4 adrenals going to the vet Alix went
along and the tumor was taken off.  The pathologist was worried about the
size and shape, said we needed to watch it, although this one was benign.
Then suddenly she became blind, right after her surgery.  But she learned
her area, knew how to navigate.  The itchiness kept on, she suddenly lost
her hair above the tail, and in August she had adrenal surgery.  She
never got all her hair back, but the itchiness went away.  She made the
move from Lafayette to here, the temporary housing fine, and then the
house.  Here she was blind, but she'd navigate the stairs like a pro.
I'd carry her downstairs, she'd eat her gravy or duck soup, she'd get
going on the kitchen floor and slip/slide, pick herself up and keep
going.  and inevitably go back up and crawl on the bed to sleep.  I'd
find her in a pillowcase, snoozing away.  I watched her go downstairs,
watched how she navigated and felt her way down, hovering over her so
protectively.  Two and a half weeks ago her weight, which hadn't been
good for a month, suddenly started dropping even more.  Off to the vet,
and he diagnosed insulinoma, and he was afraid of pancreatitis.  So onto
pedia pred, and she had a great burst of energy.  Then the tip of her
tail looked as though it had been cut-turned black.  Back to the
vet-she'd thrown an embolism and we had to have her tail tip amputated.
Weight still going down.  Caitlyn Martin suggested an enzyme from the vet
for the Pancreatitis, and I got Panakare Plus this week.  So I started
her on it and her weight came up, but then Christmas eve it crashed,
badly.  She looked like a walking skeleton.  I started force feeding her
Christmas eve day and night, Christmas day.  Then her eyes started
sinking, her weight went away totally, and yesterday afternoon she
refused to eat.  If I forced food and water she'd gag, act like it hurt,
and I just couldn't do it to her anymore.  The tip of her tail again
looked like it was turning dark, and her vulva looked bloody, and when I
cleaned it it seemed to hurt her, and there was blood there.  She'd let
me hold her for over an hour, then she wanted back to her group.  I found
Muggles curled around her one time yesterday, Joy with her another, then
four or five of them all around her.  I thought she was leaving me last
night, and I told her it was all right.  I reminded her that Bailey would
be waiting, along with Socks, Kit, Suzy, Nelly, Nibbles, Jill, Chili, and
now Gandalf.  But she was still with us this morning, still listening to
my voice, but not eating.  My husband took me to work, and he brought her
with him this evening.  We took her to the emergency vet clinic.  and I
told them, no heart stick.  I wanted her to be put under with gas, then
an injection to the abdomen.  While waiting for the vet I held her, told
her how very much I loved her, how special she was and always would be.
I told her I knew the others were waiting, that Bailey would be so
excited.  And then it came time, and I held her till her brave little
heart stopped beating.  She'll be cremated, and a special pouch is
waiting for her.  I'm not having a necropsy on her, I made the decision
because she's already had too much to deal with this year.  This has been
such a week of highs and lows, so many lows.  Gandalf, my big baby boy,
suddenly gone with juvenile lymphoma, and now Alix, my little Roman nosed
Alixia my Pixia, gone.  So tiny, so regal, and so big a hole in my heart.
I haven't quit crying yet, won't for a while.  I know her group all said
their good byes to her today.
 
Sandee, please watch for Alix.  She'll be a sliver mitt, tiny girl, eyes
will be so bright again, tail fully formed, beautiful coat once again.
Have Bailey and the others teach her the correct war dance, and that it's
all right to be silly, to lose her dignity, which she was always stunned
when she did.  She loves chicken gravy and duck soup.  Good bye, my sweet
Alix, until I can see you and all the others again.  You have taken such
a huge piece of me with you.  I'm so sorry I couldn't make you better,
couldn't heal what was wrong.  When you came you were a little lost soul,
and I told you you'd never have another home other than with me, that I'd
always be there with you.  Right now you've truly gone home and I'm not
there, but you won't need me now, you'll never be alone, be hurt or be
sad again.  Have fun, sweet Alixia My Pixia, till I can kiss your little
head again.
 
Rebecca and the grieving Crew of Merry Mayhem
"Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for thou art crunchy, and
 taste good with ketchup"
"Support bacteria, it's the only culture some people have"
[Posted in FML issue 4009]