I was in the middle of whipping up some Bob C. chicken soup today when
I walked into the living room for a few second breather.  I make a very
large, time consuming amount of soup at a time.
 
I saw several of the ferrets and the small female cat I rescued last year
keen to pounce on some animal, and watched as the sun gleamed off the cats
gold and black speckled fur.  What a lovely feline I ended up with.  Her
muscles were tensed and ready.  The ferrets were climbing the screen.
Ding bats.  Every one.
 
I figured that they were looking at one of the three large crows that come
to steal cat food and peanuts.  I had just thrown out some bones and meat
for the large black birds a half hour earlier, and thus was fairly certain
that the ugly winged caw monsters were busy looting the grounds.
 
I walked quietly through the living room-naturally keeping my eyes peeled
for any poisonous green Mamba snakes that might be napping in the sunlight
on the carpet.  My eyes were greeted with a most disturbing sight.  No
birds were on the lawn.  BUT===My sweet darling rotund squirrel?
 
had a chicken bone with meat in its paws and was busy tearing off the
chicken with its teeth!!!!
 
Waas up wi that?
Am I on Monty Python?
Is a pet dead parrot going to arrive for me next week?
Is a man eating ferret going to rip apart the men that mow my lawn this
Thursday?
 
Last week I was accosted by a sleeping deadly green snake (yes, snakes can
TOO accost while they are asleep)!
And now I am witness to:
A CARNIVOROUS SQUIRREL
 
My thoughts naturally recall the ditty that my mother sang to us when we
were children before they took her away that has become impregnated in my
mind
 
"Just like the nuts that fall you're a little cracked that's all."
 
Probably the reason I adore ferrets: I am not all there.  And I have a
pregnant mind.
 
Sorry.  No time to print my name.
Looking for the rest of me.
[Posted in FML issue 3223]