In a world that is rife with misconceptions, misinterpretations, and the
dissemination of false information, it's not surprising that some of all
three frequently show up on the FML.  In a population of 3000+ readers and
posters, with new people joining all the time, there is always going to be
a percentage of people who:
 
a) Are just learning about ferrets and have gotten incorrect information
b) Are listening to someone who pushes the wrong cures or tries to
   convince people there are "quick fixes"
c) Know someone who runs a shelter or rescue and refuse to believe anyone
   other than that person
d) all of the above or some other form of misconception
 
In any walk of life, any hobby, any interest, any group that is drawn
together by a single thread of interest but who are otherwise very
different people, you are going to have differences of opinion.  You are
going to have people who believe very different things.  You are going
to have those who are looking for information to form an opinion, and you
are going to have people whose opinions are so rooted that no one else's
opinion will sway them one bit.
 
So where's the problem?
 
The problems arise when the correction of someone else's misconception
cannot be made without a snide remark, a character assassination, a
dispersion cast on that other individual.  At one time or another we are
all guilty of some form of this.  I have not always been kind in my
remarks either.
 
As a ferret "advocate" and someone who tries to watch out for the welfare
of ferrets, it's important for me to be careful about what I say.  And it
is not easy.  When I am at an education demonstration and a ferret owner
is happily chirping away about how her ferret eats nothing but Fruit Loops
and bits of cinnamon-raisin bagel, my instinct of course is to clout the
person over the head, right before I confiscate their ferret!  The
challenge for me lies in remaining civil and keeping her attention while I
explain that she is slowly killing her ferret by offering him a diet that
is the equivalent of a human being eating nothing but doughnuts and candy
bars all day.
 
The danger is that my explanation will elicit nothing but hostility from
her, causing her to walk away WITHOUT listening to my warning that her
ferret's health depends on him eating a diet that's nutritious for him.
If I approach her on the attack from the get-go, get immediately hostile
and condescending, and make it clear that I regard her as a shoe-in for
World's Most Ignorant Ferret Owner award, she will not listen to me and
will walk away feeling like I am a big jerk.  Thus even though I know she
is hurting her ferret by feeding him a bad diet, my knowledge does the
ferret no good, because if I come at her with anger and sarcasm, I don't
get a chance to educate this owner and get her to feed her ferret a better
diet.
 
If I approach the matter with some urgency, "You really need to get him
onto a ferret food diet, because he cannot digest Fruit Loops and bagel,
and he is not getting any nutrition from those food.  He will slowly
starve to death unless he starts eating real ferret food.  Remember that
a pet is like a toddler; if a two-year-old could eat sweets all day, he
would.  You have to be the "parent" and make sure your ferret eats a diet
that will keep him healthy." A detailed description of the costs of the
health deterioration usually rounds out the education of a ferret owner
who didn't realize a ferret can't subsist on sugary cereals and spoonfuls
of ice cream, as much as he may love them.
 
If I came at her, "What's wrong with you?  You'll feed your ferret
anything people tell you to feed it, won't you?  You don't know anything
about ferrets!" how long would she be willing to stand there and listen
to me?  My guess is about .o5 seconds before she left in a huff.
 
People don't like to be told they're doing something wrong.  But when
little fuzzy lives hang in the balance, we do have to find a way to tell
owners that what they are doing is harming their pet.  The trick lies in
finding a way to say it that does not bury the needed information in an
avalanche of rude remarks and aspersions cast on the person's character.
 
My basic point here?
 
All the knowledge in the world does no good if it can't be shared in a way
that will benefit the person you're trying to share it with.
 
-Heather W.
 Still learning about ferrets from Dante, Nikita, Dusty, Beanie, Boomer,
 and Rocky
[Posted in FML issue 3673]