>OK, Scott is shaving and has migratory hairs on his body, Blacky Black
>Bear is slurpin' up the cauldrin, then WHO is snaping those pictures
>(adorable pictures, by the way)?  It couldn't be the wife who comes in
>later and knocks the snot out of her husband for letting his side-kick
>slurp yucky water--could it?  Hum, I sometimes wonder about you Wolfy.
 
Deva, let me introduce you to Wolfy 101.
 
Each day that I wake up, before I even roll over, I love to lay in bed
and think up every possible way that I can lie to (ex: "look out of the
window, Chet... look, it's Barney") and mortify (ex: ::turning to Chet's
girlfriend ... :: "it's sad, but we still have to humor him once in a
while.  I hate it when Walmart runs out of Barney underwear.") my
children
 
After I get up, then I wander around the house looking for Scott (the
husband) to see if I can catch him in as many compromising ways as
possible.  You know that Sprint PCS ad that came out when they invented
camera phones?  They claimed that if you bought their new technological
wonder you could finally be able to prove that there is a monster in your
closet or a sock eater in your laundry.  They modeled that campaign after
me.  You have to understand.  I hunt down my husband with my phone at my
side like a six shooter each day with every bit of intensity that Steve
Irwin hunts down crocodiles in the outback.  In my life, the shot and the
chance to mortify someone I love, comes first.  So in other words, when I
caught my oldest son wearing nothing but a pink thong chasing around his
little autistic brother who can't mentally handle "gray areas", I yelled,
"Stop!".  I snapped the picture.  THEN I walked over and pulled the
string and let it snap back on his little pickle.  "Damnit it son, what
are you doing?  What would your father say?  What's the matter with you?
You could at least stuff it with more socks so when I took the picture
you didn't look like a woman.  Cripes!"
 
Wolfy 101.
 
Wolfy
http://wolfysluv.com
[Posted in FML issue 5179]