Dear Ferret Folks-

I am so glad that Bisquit is showing that amazing ferret resiliency,
and bouncing back from his horrible ride in the dryer. Bet he won't
do that again.

As a ferret mommy who lost a baby (Switch the Kit) on her watch, I
send Lisette power hugs. I know about the guilt and the just....awful
feelings. Lots of what if's and if I had just's....I am not the only
ferret mommy on the FML who lost a baby in her care. It doesn't get
talked about much, basically because it makes the mommy in question
feel like dirt. *Small* dirt. Well, ferrets are like real babies in one
respect. I read an interview with Michael J.Fox in which he was talking
about fatherhood. He said that the first few years with the kids were
"suicide watch." I think that sums it up pretty well, having talked my
sister down from the cieling after her son (three at the time) tried to
dig an electrical socket out of the wall with a fork. She put him down
for the night in his *bed.* How was she to know he was storing a fork
in his room for electrical experimentation once the lights were out?

Ferrets are like that. If ferrets could manipulate forks, they, too,
would blast themselves across the room, their fur smoking.

Me, I left a vital door open, and Switch the Kit had her fateful
encounter with my sister in law's dog. I've re-lived it so many times
the memories almost don't mean anything anymore,but they were certainly
powerful for a very, very long time. Once I started the memory I
basically couldn't stop watching until the inevitable outcome, it was
like I was a hostage being forced to watch a horror movie. That goes
away. It takes time.

It takes time. Power hugs to all of us Mommies in mourning. It's a sad,
secret club to belong to. Entrance dues are really steep.

Alexandra in MA

[Posted in FML 5631]