This was posted, I believe on the FML, many years ago, and I saved it.
I find it very funny, and so true. I have no idea who the author is,
so can't give him/her proper credit.

AWAY FROM THE MANGER
(For all ferret folks who have ever tried to put a crEche under
their Christmas tree)

Away from the manger the Christ child has gone --
He was there just this morning, it's not been that long
It looks like kidnappers climbed up here to play
The little lord Jesus went missing today!

The camel's tipped over despite Elmer's glue
There once were three Wise Men but now there's just two
Gaspar and Melchior are missing their bro --
Wherever did Jesus and Bathasar go?

I looked in the manager and what did I see?
A red plastic ball where the Christ child should be
The bottommost garland's unwound from the tree --
I think Christmas gnomes have been visiting me!

Oh say can you see by the dawn's early light
Goatnappers stole all three lambs sometime last night
And Joseph's knocked down and I fear that he's dead
There's wet sticky candy cane stuck to his head!

The Snow Village looks in complete disarray --
An earthquake knocked down several houses today
The trees were all toppled and dragged far away
It looks like Godzilla came up here to play!

Looked under the sofa and what did I see?
Two candy canes and a snow village tree
A pair of my socks and lambs one, two, and three
One potato, two Wise Men, and a stash of Kay-Tee.

Way under the sofa I found him today=97
The little lord Jesus asleep in the hay,
With a chunk of Cheweasel to cushion his head
Next year he'll be up on the mantle instead!!!

[Moderator's note: First posted, anonymously, on Christmas day 1999
in FML 2909. BIG]

[Posted in FML 5830]