Little did I know two days ago when I posted with joy about my birthday
gift, that I would now be posting with great sorrow.
 
Gizmo, my favorite baby, my sweetheart, the love of my life, was helped to
the Bridge last night (12/8).  I am completely heartbroken.
 
I've cried with everyone who's posted about their ferrets passing on.  But
I really didn't know it would hurt this bad.  I can barely speak this
morning.  I forced myself to come to work, because I thought it might help.
It doesn't.
 
I've posted Giz's picture on my bulletin board above my computer.  He was
so healthy in that picture.  His fur was thick and beautiful, his eyes
were bright, his nose was twitching in excitement.  That's the way I am
picturing him at the Bridge now.  Bobbing along in his little Gizzy way,
kind of a lumbering gait, as he was always long & lanky.
 
I asked my dog Mandi, who has been waiting (im)patiently at the Bridge for
almost 3 years now to greet him and make sure he's comfortable.  She never
really liked the ferrets, but I know she'll do it for me.
 
Sandee, if you see a gorgeous DEW with a scattering of black hairs down his
back (we always argued over whether he would count as a silver), please let
him know where to find the FerretVite.  It's his favorite treat.
 
My Gizzard is going to be so happy.  No more doses of prednisone shoved
down his throat or upset tummies from the insulinoma, no more nakedness
from the recurrence of the adrenal disease, no more needle-sticks for
glucose tests.
 
I miss him so much.  The little snuffles in my ear as I held him.  The
Gizzy sighs as he rested against my shoulder.  The super intelligent eyes
that would blink at me with complete understanding.  The long, long fingers
on his front feet.  The little broken toe on his back right foot that sat a
little crooked.  The big, sweet pink nose with the brown smudge.
 
I'm sorry, Giz, that I waited.  I knew you were trying to tell me Tuesday
night that you wanted to go.  But I just wasn't ready.  I am trying to
understand.  I told you last night that it was OK to go, and I meant it.
Be healthy and happy, sweetheart.  You'll never have to suffer or feel pain
again.  How does that line from Hamlet go?  "Good night, sweet prince.  May
flights of angels sing thee to thy rest." I love you, Giz, with all my
heart.
 
Thank you, FMLers, for letting me cry on your shoulders.  Knowing you are
all there and that you care helps tremendously.
 
=====
Aileen & the Herd minus one Herdling
Slinky, Kyle, Noel, & Sandy
Missing Gizmo so much. We love you, baby.
 
"It is a shameful thing that you should mind these folks
that are out of their wits." -Martha Carrier, condemned Salem 'witch'
[Posted in FML issue 2893]