(Two gray sable ladies crouch side by side beneath the kitchen table.
It is late.  The house is dark, and still.  One lady holds a small sheaf
of yellow post it notes between her two front paws.  She speaks...)
 
" Ahem...Hello, hoomins.  (Reading from the prepared statement) This
is Switch the Kit, (girnning nervously) and I have been asked by my
fraternal organization, the FLO, to answer a question that Mary Jo
asked yesterday about a possible outside ferret play area."
 
"Her question was 'Can ferrets climb a wire fence?'"
 
(Both ladies now put on the most innocent, harmless expressions that they
can come up with, huge liquid eyes, like those paint on black velvet
paintings, the whole nine yards.)
 
"On behalf of the worldwide FLO membership, I would like to state...ah,
cata..cata..(Lily whispers in Switches' ear) CATEGORICALLY that no,
ferrets cannot climb wire fences.  Nope, not at all.  Wish we could.
Gee golly, land a goshen, wouldn't that be something?  Criminy!  But
no...can't climb wire fences.  Caaan't climb wire fences."
 
(Folding the little yellow sheets in half and laying them down on the
rug in front of her.)  "Thank you for your time."  (Lily again whispers
in Switches' ear) "And good night."  (Both ladies smile hugely, wrinkling
their little, innocent pink noses and exposing pointy little fangs.)
 
Alexandra in Massachusetts
[Posted in FML issue 3937]