Hi Jen,
Remember that intonation is not readable over words.  If you felt I was
harsh, I encourage you to go back and reread my post with a "softer tone"
in mind.  I was not bashing you.  You need to stop taking this personally.
Many people on this list are inexperienced and many are experienced.  We
all contribute in many different ways.  My answer was not only for you but
to get other people to think about their ferrets behavior in another way.
 
If you knew me, you would know I wouldn't bash anyone... many on the list
know me and have met me.  They also know that I have a great passion for
ferrets.  If you don't believe me... ask them.
 
Jen, I sense that you got your hackles up when you didn't need to.  I once
got an e-mail from Dr. Bruce Williams about one of my ferrets in which I
thought he was putting me down.  At first I was angry.  Then I went back
and read and reread the e-mail.  He wasn't bashing me at all, but because
of how I felt at the time, I thought he was.  Perception is everything
and I don't believe that Dr. Williams would ever say anything to anyone
to be hurtful.  I am no different than he.  If you feel I was bashing
you, I apologize, But I do encourage you to reread the post and imagine
me with my softer voice.
 
You stated... "FYI, Coonsie had an overnight stay at the vet, and it turns
out that he has a urinary infection.  If I had read your advice before I
took him to the vet, I might not have brought him because I was shunned
so much for thinking something was wrong."
 
As I stated... "obviously rule out any medical conditions before
proceeding."   As quoted directly from what you quoted I said.  So you
see, it was all there if you had read it all carefully.  But I understand
you being upset... you didn't know what was going on with Coonsie and one
doesn't always think with a clear mind when we don't understand why our
ferrets do what we think they shouldn't be doing.  I've been in the same
boat.
 
You are very welcome on the separation issue.  Please keep me posted.  I
like to hear how people are doing with their ferrets.
 
As for the litter box statement... again, not aimed at you per say...
many people l make comments about having a perfect litterbox user... but
then they write about how they don't do so well down the road.  I want
people in general to be supportive of their geriatric or incontinent
ferrets as seeing how many of them get surrendered at our local rescue,
it is something that needs to be repeated.... often.
 
Jen, I think you need to take the posts of people "like me" with a little
more distance.  In much the same way you want kinder words used to be
spoken to, understand that for many of us experienced ferret owners, and
FML long timers that many questions are repetitive.  Understand that when
"harsher" words are used that they may not be intended to be harsh.  There
was nothing personally aimed at you.  Understand that we all have good
days and bad days.  Besides spending my day looking out for my group of
15, I also write brochures for the ferret rescue, research new ferret
information, correspond to as many as 20 to 30 ferret owners personally
on a daily basis, gotten involved with other animal rescues, design
educational resources for them, edit and write a newsletter, and now am
working with a group with global ferret education in mind.  I do this
when I am sick and when I am healthy.  I'm probably one of the nicest
people you'll ever get to know.  So before blasting me (and essentially
doing what you said I did to you) why not just drop me a line and ask me
if I mean what I said in a harsh way.  Too often we misinterpret
intentions... all we really need to do is just clarify the situation.
 
If you still think I am being harsh... just rite to me and I will try to
ease your mind further.
 
betty and her blur o'fur
for the love of ferrets
[Posted in FML issue 3778]