Wanted to start this out with something cool I accidently found while
looking for something I couldn't find.  I am not sure of the accuracy, so I
thought I would toss it out for someone more knowledgable to comment upon.
 
Hob is the term given to uncut male ferrets.  Did you also know that in
English folklore, Hob was the familar name of the sprite, Robin Goodfellow,
the household spirit full of mischeivous, sometimes malicious acts.  The
being who usually recieved the blame when things went wrong at home.  Also,
Hob, Hobb, Hobbie, Bob, Bobby, Rob and Robin are all short for Robert.  (Mo'
Hob here....)
 
I don't know the accuracy of all this, but found it interesting that the
description of a "Hob" fit our beasties so well.  Does anyone know if the
association is more than coincidental?
 
Q: What about fear pooping?
 
A: Fear poop; here's the scoop.
 
It's virtually universal in terrestrial vertebrates.  I could give a
longwinded explaination of vagus nerve response, adrenalin load, and office
feces flinging, but suffice it to say, its a physiological response and the
animal can't control it.  I know of no Darwinian study concerning the
response, and it's so complicated, I simply can't make an accurate guess to
the reason.  But be nice to them, and remember they are also upset.  So
don't say anything and embarrass them or they might get a complex and suffer
emotional damage.  (And they say my new-age sensitivity training didn't
help...)
 
I also want eveyone to now I've suppressed the urge to make dozens of
scatological puns and comments.  I fear poop is not the issue!  She-it.
Crap, I made one.  It was stinky, two.  Am I in the poop now.  I'd better
stop before someone poopdecks me out.  (Doesn't my humor bowel you over?)
 
Q: Ferrets, cold weather, and tunnels. (FML thread)
 
A: Well, if ferrets couldn't handle the cold weather, they wouldn't be here
at all.  End of story.  Housing ferrets indoors is, historically speaking,
recent, and biologically speaking, a blink in time.  The first time I ever
saw a ferret was when I was all of 18, visiting England for the first time.
I stayed with some people near York (why don't they call it "Old York?") and
they took me outside to see their hob.  It was as large as a mountain goat.
Ok, a small cat, but huge for ferret standards.  Anyway, there was about 18
inches of snow on the ground, and the ferret lived in a concrete-floored
cage, with a nesting box about two feet off the ground.  I expressed
surprise, but my friend assured me he was a 12th generation ferret breeder
(don't ask he how he knew how many generations), and they always lived
outside with no ill effects.
 
First, a couple of factoids.  If it is -10F, with a wind chill taking it
down to -30F, what is the temperature under the snow?  No wind chill, so it
has to be warmer than -30F.  The temperature of ice is 32F, which is alot
warmer than -10F.  Plus, snow is a great insulator (As a scout--no comments,
please-- each year I used to snow camp at the 8,000 ft level in the Sierras.
We always made snow caves, and they were always much warmer than our tents.
If your car breaks down, burrow in the snow and light a candle.  You'll
live, but in the metal car, you could freeze to death) Now, we are not
talking about the arctic circle here; most places where polecats live are
fairly temperate, and sustained extreme cold is unusual.
 
Polecats have a dense layer of fat just under ths skin.  You are probably
noticing your ferrets puting on the bulk about now; they are slaves to their
genetics.  Fat is great insulation.  Also, ferret fur has two layers, a
heavy upper coat (guard hair) and a soft, thick under coat.  The oil that
makes ferrets smell the way they do makes this fur almost waterproof,
improving the insulation.  Finally, ferrets have a high/fast metabolic rate,
which is great if you have to keep warm in cold climates (assuming you have
enough food to eat)
 
As for tunnels, they almost always go into the magic depth where summer and
winter temperature tend to average (The exact depth depends on the
environment, but generally it's about 3 feet.) So even if its -30F outside,
three feet under the ground it might be 40-45F; not a problem.  Add to that
the heat given off by decomposing feces and nesting vegetation, and the
temperature could climb to a tropical 60F.
 
As for ferrets living outdoors, I think it is a personal choice of the
responsible owner, nothing more.  I have certainly seem healthy ferrets that
are exclusively housed outdoors, and sick ones housed indoors.  If someone
was negligently housing their ferrets outdoors, you could bet a beer the
same would be true if they were inside.  It's not the environment, it is the
owner.  BTW, I think cooler is heathier for ferrets, but can't cite one good
reference.
 
Mo' Bob and the 18 Polechats. (Missing Gus)
[Posted in FML issue 1722]