Troy Lynn, know what you mean about getting the needle in with some of
them. Fritter wasn't hard to sub-q, but when we had to do Hjalmar once
afterward, his skin was so tough that the change from trying to enter to
actually entering really scared me. He was also one of the two closest
animals I've ever had in my life, too, and after it was done I was feeling
nauseated, went into the bathroom and promptly fainted. It was the only
time in my entire life that I have ever fainted from stress, and I'm
someone who nursed my mom through terminal illness.
It is so good to have this list each morning right now. It's always good
to be able to share with special folks, and to read about ferrets, but
right now with so much on my plate this break is extra special.
Yes, they cry or moan (depending on the ferret and the situation) when
things are really bad. Steve and I hope the kidney surgery turns out to
be successful.
There are times to just let a conversation die away; otherwise, the
misinterpretations or rumors keep being imposed on everyone. People who
insist on misinterpreting after an explanation has arrived will probably
continue to do so no matter what you say. You just have to let that be
their problem because it is not your's and it really is their's. Either
they learn to listen and to forgive (and apologize if they are really
classy and actually were at fault) or they aren't up to achieving that,
yet. You can't do their maturing for them, and when they do it at their
own rate it will "take" better. Hey, I was a slow learner on some
aspects -- used to hurt easily and get angry easily before I realized that
sometimes I was just taking other people's problems and making them mine in
situations where I'd already done when could be done and really tried to
consider all sides of an issue. My biggest problem was dealing with people
who can't compromise -- who think it's "losing" -- then I realized that I
have to see that as their short-coming and just let it roll off once I've
done my part. If they won't listen to alternatives they can't be forced to
listen, so just let it slide and move on to something constructive. Most
prefer that. (Have to agree with another poster that people with anger
problems (once they have matured past a point where they shouldn't have
them in everyday life) need to treat that as a health issue, but the ones
I've known with that difficulty are about the last people who would seek
help because they see everything wrong as being someone else's fault and
themselves as the victims of other people's "errors". It's a chronic
victim behavior for too many, just as getting others to fight one's battles
is a chronic victim behavior on the other end. Both are running scared;
one just does it by calling for help while the other shows teeth. Either
can upset the list by causing widening arguments. It's also better for
ferrets to have owners who learn to accept responsibility in this life --
safer, better care, less dumping, etc. Hope the having fuzz-buzzes gets
more and more people to look beyond themselves and act responsibly.)
Read years back about some home-raised wolverines in a research project.
Many of the play behaviors were the same as ferrets -- but adjusted for
size. Arrggghhhhhhhhhhh...
Yesterday I wrote: "Oh, pronounced age will often cause this shape, too,
just as it can cause balding at times -- hey, just like in humans on both
scores. To clarify I meant pear-shape, not water balloon belly in that
sentence.
One other point in relation to the arguments which made FML life
unpleasant: for the most part there is no reason to have them. When there
isn't a ferret life in the balance it's easier to relax and just take
things off list. Remember, they are only words (Sticks and stones...).
The movie The Matrix wasn't just an action flick; it was also a parable
about internet communications. Do you remember how the rescue of
Fishburne's character involved wild gunfire into the office yet he was
unhurt by that gunfire because he was in a mental state in which he could
not THINK he'd been hit? Do you recall how the lead character's only
chance for survival would be to finally realize COMPLETELY that what he was
undergoing while in the Matrix was ONLY mental -- only VIRTUAL? ("Do not
try to bend the spoon..."). My point is that the people here can NOT turn
around and bop you one on the snout. You are SAFE!!!!! You do not need
to over-apologize, or ask for defenders directly or indirectly, and you
certainly don't need to get ugly and angry. No one here can hit you, bite
you, bash you over head, or whatever over your modem. You are physically
isolated from us. So, take ten, deep, slow breaths, relax, think about the
ISSUE at hand rather than the personalities and go from there. That will
give the list the best chance of long survival and permit space for helping
as many ferrets and ferret people as possible.
What is said here is advice, but if there is one thing I've learned from
being here from the beginning it's that people CHOOSE whether to take the
advice or not. Ultimately, whatever happens in out of the poster's hands
and in those of the reader. If people think that something is worth their
money they will put their money there, if they think it's worth their time
they will put their time there. Most will just read and do nothing
interactive at all, ***nothing***, but they will learn ways to help their
ferrets, try some, then try others -- as THEY decide. If too much space
is spent on defensive gestures that aren't even needed, given that it's
only a "matrix-reality" (i.e. virtual), then there won't be the space for
posts which help more readers and thus help more ferrets. If you LET
that virtual-projectile become a bullet in your chest rather than an
interpretation which can be ignored, then you as much as the poster have
caused your pain, by believing that you should be injured.
Sukie
(who is still learning and took a very long time to realize these things)
[Posted in FML issue 2820]
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