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From:
Sukie Crandall <[log in to unmask]>
Date:
Sat, 24 Feb 1996 16:12:51 -0500
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Ah, so Rosanne Barr is an XO, no wonder she BUGS me now and then.
(Apologies, extended to Ms.  B.  and anyone who got the joke and is now
groaning.)
 
Kelleen, I wanted to send another thank you for telling us about the sad
accident a while back.  Like you we often have our ferrets pull the sweaters
off their shelves, but fortunately, never into a walkway.  Your advice did
come in handy, though, when I recently bought a throw rug to cover a stain
which just will not come out of the carpet.  (It's not the ferrets' fault; a
guest had tar on a shoe.) Knowing your situation we watched as they
burrowed, and guess what?  We could NOT see them under it!  Luckily we
already knew about Lok-Lift ( a round of applause for the French inventor,
please) which we had to use when we put down plastic runner in a spot where
they dig since our substrate tends to not hold nails well, so the rug is
well secured and they are safe.  (BTW, I got the stuff from a hardware
catalog, but anyone who wants Lok-Lift for protecting ferrets or aging
parents can write the U.S.  manufacturer: Optimum Technologies, Inc., 570
Joe Harris Parkway, Cartersville, GA 30120 to find out who has it near you.
I can't recall if I got it from Silva (though I think it was this one),
Sporties or Alsto, nor do I get any profit from telling folks about it,
except that maybe it will help and we will all be spared the ache of an
accident story.) I am sure that your generosity with theinformation saved
more ferrets than our's, K.  Maybe this adhesive tape will also save some
fml inhabitants.  (Oh, chimps are apes, BTW, quite different from monkeys;
just thought you might want to know, K..)
 
More ancient curses, please!!!  That one is a corker.
 
Thank you, thank you, E.S. for providing more Ferretman.  By the way, are
any females with hyperhirsuteness going to come into the fluffy tail's tale?
(I ask because I was born covered with hair till I shed like a snake (and
people wondered why I identify with critters so much) and am still a touch
furrier (Okay, I DO know the differences between fur and hair, but am being
casual, alright?) than the norm and happy that with menopause I regrew
bilateral lines (albeit sparse ones) from temple to eyebrows as well as the
more usual additions.  If so, please, don't let her believe (at least not
past teen years) the social stigma in this country on hairiness in women!!
Ferretwomen to the rescue!  It sure helps a person get through the flu when
there is funny stuff to read.
 
ERIN, are you at the Drew which is between Morristown and Summit?  If so,
consider Hanan Caine of the Basking Ridge Animal Hospital on South Finley in
Basking Ridge.  He did an exotics specialization at the AMC.  Their phone
number is 1-908-766-4211 if memory serves.
 
Dick, we are certain overjoyed to hear that aside from the car everything
turned out fine.  My guess is that Joan gets lots of extra spoiling for a
long time.  (Here's something Steve springs on me now and then; he gives me
roses the day before my birthday to thank me for the last year.) Kiss those
fuzzies for us.
 
Becki and all others with sad news recently; we are sorry and thinking of
you.
 
Ferret people is perfect, as are the additions.  Lets see, did anyone
mention stains on clothing from happy post-treat face rubs and the
occasional bum dotting?
 
Re: whether a ferret in the forest with no human to hear makes a sound:
Define sound.  (You knew someone out here had to be perverse enough to have
a bit of philosophy/critical analysis in the past, didn't you?  (Thanks to
Dr. Schivella and PJHS, and cousin Guy Wicks who gave me a appetite for such
when I was a child.))
 
Hmmmm, NPR has had at least 3 positive things about domestic ferrets over
the last 2 or 3 years so they have demonstrated that they are more
intelligent than the average news show -- something we already knew.  Maybe
what would really work (mentioned because I have had over a half dozen
things on ATC in the last ten years and am STARTING to get a feel for what
they like; most were in the last several years and comprised all but two
notes sent) would be to send in postcards or e-mail with funny stories, or
funny and cuddly stories (short and sweet with a catchy last sentence works
best; also, it helps to match the cadence to the announcers' speech
patterns), and tell them that it is in honor of the impending legalization
of domestic ferrets in Massachusetts.  I don't have the e-mail address
handy, but it is something like [log in to unmask], and their snail mail address
is: Letters, All Things Considered, National Public Radio, 635 Massachusetts
Ave., N.W., Washington, D.C.  20001.  They have heard more than enough from
me, since they did part of a note of mine this month.  Besides, the funniest
ferret story I have is with Mary of Modern Ferret right now.  (Mary, we are
looking forward to the latest edition, but, then, we look forward to all
editions.  Could you send a copy, or a back issue, to ATC as a way to help
promote the new ferret laws in MA?) Anyone who has not listened to All
Things Considered, Week End Edition, or Morning Edition is missing a real
treat; we strongly recommend them for in-depth, well balanced, thoughful,
and top-notch news coverage.  Just find out where your local NPR radio
stations are on the dial and enjoy!)
 
  Sukie, Steve, Meltdown, Ruffle, 'Chopper, Spot, Meeteetse (who STILL
  listens to NPR even though there was recently a different science
  reporter on; she is as faithful to them as Haleakala was to PHC), & Warp
[Posted in FML issue 1488]

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