For all of you, who have had the adventure of ferrets-as-companions for a
number of years, this little account of telephone conversation I had earlier
today will probably bring forth rueful grins and sheepish smiles. Only
after I had returned to other things did I realize how many times I have had
just this sort of call before, and how many memories each repetition evokes.
sooo...
[pager triggers with a 911 suffix that tells me its a critical, 'life and
death' emergency for a fuzzy somewhere]
[the return call is picked up before the first ring has ended]
young woman answers, babbleing and hysterical... 'Hello? It's you isn't it?
It's just gotta be you..I think she's dead and I don't know what to do!!!!
She was just fine a few minutes ago, she was leaping and playing and making
that funny little squeaky hummy noise, and she was so happy!!! Oh, God,
she's just a baby, what have I done wrong?... I only looked away for a
minute, honest it was just a minute or two.. and when I looked back she was
just laying there... half under the play blanket, limp, just totally limp!!!
I've tried everything.. I shook her.. I scruffed her and rubbed her back
real hard... I spritzed her face with the plant mist bottle.. I even, well,
I ... I swatted her! And nothing.. she just lays there... I---
I finally get a word in edgewise.. 'Whoa.. Stop.. Back Up... Slow Down...
OK.. Are you listening?? (yes) OK.. Now lets see if I have this
straight.. Your ferret kit was playing and having a great time and doing
all the crazy things that are normal for kits..right?? (yes..but) AND you
looked away for a few minutes to attend to something else and when you
looked back to check on her she was laying half under a soft cloth of some
kind and when you went to her she was completely unresponsive... right so
far?? (yes...but) AND nothing you have tried has changed her condition in
any way.. right? (yes..but) OK.. Now do exactly what I tell you.. OK???
(OK) Place the kit on your lap, on her back, with her head on your knees and
her feet toward your tummy... Got her there??? (yes) Now, look very
carefully at her chest... is she breathing at all???.. [LONG PAUSE] (yes, I
think so, but she is barely moving) OK... now make a U with your thumb and
forefinger and put the thumb on one side of her little chest, on her ribs
just in front of her leg, and the forefinger on the other side in the same
position, with your nails contacting the chest... Got it??? (yes, OK)
Now... TICKLE THAT FUZZY!! (EXCUSE ME?) Go on... Tickle her!!! [silence
for about two seconds]
Young womans voice, now in tears... 'Oh, Your all right, Oh you scared
Mommy... My little Sweetie Lamb really really really scared her Mommy...
Mommy was so worried about her darling little Sugar Plumb... Here, Mommys
little Angel, eat some treats and Mommy will fix her little Love Bunny
something very special for her din-din.......'
[three pages of such sophisticated dialogue later I quietly hung up the
phone.. obviously totally forgotten]
I have no doubt the experience, if not the identical circumstance, is one we
have in common... I well remember the panic only a deeply slumbering ferret
kit can evoke in a rational human being.
All of us in our lives have had a time of guilt laden sorrow, and a time of
life when we were filled with ecstatic euphoria...
But when I hear someone talking of the intense grief and the equally intense
euphoria occurring in the same 10 minutes... I just smile and comment: "Oh,
Got ferrets..Huh??' as I pass them by.. :]
There is simply nothing in this world to compare with
The Ferret Experience!
dayna
dayna frazier 102046,3162
'resident of the 'Marvellous Menagerie of Mirthful Mayhem'
MMOMM!!!
[Posted in FML issue 1621]
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