Sob! I am afraid we have a dysfunctional family. I must speak up about it.
One of my ferrets--his name will remain anonymous--is a candy-holic! Sure,
it started out with apples and raisins, but before I knew it, he was into
stronger hooch--maple syrup and honey. Now, he can resist no longer the
sweet sweet taste of sugar. Like most family members, I was unaware of the
problem before it was too late. Yes, he has resorted to STEALING the stuff.
I feel to blame, since it was I, oh woeful I, who gave him his first bite
of marshmallow strawberry. If only I could turn back the clock to a simpler
time... I have stopped enabling his habit, but feel helpless as to what to
do when he takes it upon himself to find our "stashes". Just this
afternoon, I heard the beep of my computer and the pitter-patter of little
feet over the keyboard. I rushed into the room to stop him from raiding the
small plastic bag of blue whales on the desk, but alas! He was already
chewing away under the book case. I think I could deal with it if he
resorted to these outbreaks in public, but it appears that he has taken to
eating alone...one of the most severe signs of a serious candy-holic.
People, keep us in your thoughts, and God grant us the serenity to see our
way through this ordeal together as a family...
 
Yours truly
Gloria & Peter (people), Sable & the anonymous ferret (we'll refer to him
in this posting as "Bob"), and Tipper the Manx.
[Posted in FML issue 1202]