Q: "Who in the .... appionted (sic) you feret (sic) God? Your (sic) just a
know it all who likes to think he is sumptin (sic) by writing crap no one
ever reads....get a life asswhole (sic)."
 
A: Now you've done it.  Now my feelings are hurt.  That's it; I quit the
FML.  You'll not have Bob to push around anymore.  I'm out of here.  (I
don't think so.)
 
BTW, I'm confused by your use of "asswhole." Do you mean I'm a whole ass,
or just don't know the word means a hole in a ass?  And what kind of ass?
A donkey?  A burro?  I'm just curious.  Anyway, you have better start being
polite or I'm going to fry your ass with a lightning bolt, buddy.  You
don't want to irritate a minor deity holding an electrified bacula.
 
Q: "How are you able to write so much?"
 
A: I copy the stuff from the back of oatmeal boxes.
 
Q: "What are 3 names you would love to give a ferret?"
 
A: Albert, Charles and Zurkie. The first two are scientists I admire,
and the last is my spelling for the Drac name of a meteor from the
movie "Enemy Mine." I'm also partial to Bobo, Cosmo, Garbonzo and Zorro.
 
Q: "Can a ferret even have motion sickness..do they have a middle ear that
would permit the disorientation?"
 
A: They seem that way coming out of the washing machine....
 
The ferret middle ear is remarkably similar to the cat, which is remarkably
similar to humans.  Put a ferret in a bucket and spin it around a few times,
and the ferret will be just as dizzy as you would be if you could fit in the
bucket (please don't try this at home folks; we are ferret spinning
professionals).  The part of the middle ear responsible for motion sickness
is not the part that brings sound into your ear (the tiny ear bones and
eardrum), but rather a set of semi-circular canals, lined with tiny hairs
and filled with a watery fluid.  These canals, very similar to bubble
levels, orient the brain to 3-dimensions; basic physics states objects in
motion (or at rest) tend to stay in motion (or at rest).  So any movement of
the head causes the fluid in these canals to move against the tiny hairs,
which send messages to the brain saying, "Get me outta this bucket!" And
since these canals are remarkable similar in all vertebrates, from the shark
to people, all have the basic equipment for motion sickness.
 
Motion sickness (airsickness, seasickness, car sickness, swing or
merry-go-round sickness) is usually caused by irregular or rhythmatic
movements which cause various degrees of nausea.  It is a highly individual
thing; I never get motion sickness EXCEPT on merry-go-rounds.  Ride one of
those for a few minutes and I'll barf up my toes.  Motion sickness is
essentially a confusion in the spatial orientation processing of the brain,
which suffers from a sort of sensory overload.  The problem is intensified
for some when visual clues are absent.  For example, some people are
nauseated when reading in a moving car, or if they can't see out the window.
 
Ferrets have a slightly different response to motion sickness because their
brain has a slightly different structure than ours; they are not as visually
dependant for one thing.  So they seem to be more resistant to motion
sickness than humans.  However, I have personally seen ferrets with motion
sickness, so just because they seem resistant, it doesn't mean some don't
get it.  I think on the whole, while it seems fairly uncommon for ferrets to
get motion sickness, that is because the only real way we can tell is by
them barfing down the back of our necks.  How can you tell the difference
between a ferret sleeping from boredom, from being tired, or from nausea?
Motion sickness is probably under-reported because people don't recognize
it.  The good news is, so what?  They are happy to sleep it off, and most
ferrets, like people, are probably uneffected anyway, especially once they
get used to the motion stimuli.
 
Bob C and 20 MO Bucket Pilots
[Posted in FML issue 2316]