Hi, this is us again,
 
Well, we been hidin' from those trick or treaters, cause we already ate all
the candy and they don't even wanna share their raisins with us, plus we is
sleepin' anyways so we can stay up all night and stuffs...anyways, we heard
that ferrets don't even cast a reflection in the mirror and we don't like
garlic!  We is gonna go maybe next year as domestic ferrets because we is
really Eureopean Land Otters (Oterrus Europeanus
Whatthehellusisallusofthisuslatingoodforusanywaysus).
 
What you know...it is Halloween and we is now gonna do a trick on you...we
are now hypnotizing you .... you are feeling sleepy, very very sleepy...you
are now walking over to your purse or wallet or desk drawer, and you are
taking out your checkbook, and you are writing a check out for our book The
Big Adventure and you are sending it in the mail to us...you are now
unhipnotized and stuff...thanks!  So, if you are wondering where the postage
costs go to for the book, well they go to new jeeps and ammunition for the
postal worker humans...tee hee hee...anyways, if you don't already nose
about the book we is writing...well, we're gonna bite your kneecap!!  The
first 100 copies are gonna have our wittle paw prints signed in them, and we
already sold 30 books, so you do the math and finger out that you need to
get one right now!!!  We got one person from the FML gonna buy 10 to her
wittle self!  Woah!!!
 
We finished the full-color cover today and everything, the least you could
do is send us ten bucks for it!  Ha!  Sorry to be so sour, we just swallowed
some lemons...and furthermore, we is gonna apologize now for being
smartbutts and all cause we nose dat you is all nice humans out there and we
really appreciate your good replies to our story!
 
On a sidetrack, we thinks that next year we is gonna sacrifice dose
Satan-peoples instead of them doing it to us...the nerve of some of those
bad-peoples...you'd think that they wouldn't like the thought of going to
that bad place hell...maybe they want to...it defies ferret-logic...and why
don't they pick on someone their own size?  Bunch of wimps...got no morals,
respect, and probably not any brains neither...maybe the drugs have warped
what they have left...ugggg...
 
On the brighter side of Halloween, we tinks dat dis is the time of year that
everyone can be who they most like to be inside of themselves...they get to
dress up and all...and dat is good!
 
We sure wish that the FML didn't have so many sad stories about ferrets who
is sick and dying...we wish there was more happy stuff on here...but we
guess that it helps the ferrets out to get feedback from human readers!  So
it's good, just doesn't apply to all of us who just wanna have fun!!!
 
Love and Dooks To All!
 
Rosie, Maxie, Sammi, Wiggles, & Shiva
TDFFFF (The Doyle Fuzzy Fabulous Fantastic Five)
 
 ^ ^   ^ ^   ^ ^  ^ ^   ^ ^
(oo)(oo)(oo)(oo)(oo)
=v==v= =v==v= =v=
[Posted in FML issue 1739]