To celibrate the opening of Star Wars, Episode 1
       <trumpet fanfare>
 
You might be living with a Jedi Ferret if...
 
 ...your ferret opens cabinets with a light sabre.
 
 ...you find the ferret barricades cut into pieces, and little burn marks
    along all of the edges.
 
 ...you have ever had a conversation similar to:
        YOU: Bad ferret! Drop that <object> now!
        FERRET: Dook!
        YOU: You may have the <object>.
        FERRET: Dook!
        YOU: You are very cute.
        FERRET: Dook!
        YOU: I will get you a treat.
 
 ...you do not remember having the above conversation.
 
 ...you find objects flying off of bookcases.
 
 ...you find your expensive collector Star Wars "Empire" toys chewed on
    and scattered.
 
 ...you find your expensive collector Star Wars "Rebel" toys neatly
    stashed under the sofa.
 
 ...you find a photo of your foot under the sofa. On the back is written
   "Death Star".
 
 ...the phrase "Easy as shooting womp-rats in Beggar's Canyon" pops into
    your head while looking at the above photo
 
 ...the ferrets get agitated when you play the Imperial March Theme.
 
 ...the hobs get excited when Princess Leia's Theme is played.
 
 ...all of the ferrets get go completely crazy when you play the Ewok
    Dance Theme.
 
 ...you suddenly realize that Chewbacca is the genetic link between
    ferrets and humans.
 
 ...every time you wear a noisy respirator your ferret chews your arm
    off.
 
 ...you find your ferret behind or undersomething that is heavier than
    you are, and there is no way the ferret could have gotten there
    without lifting the object.
 
 ...your ferret tries to jump an impossibly long a distance........and
    makes it.
 
 ...you know your ferret is blind, but it still manages to unerringly
    chew your toe off while you are trying to dance away.
 
 ...your dog or cat performs tasks for your ferret.
 
 ...you sometimes find your ferret in a deep meditation trance with the
    appearence of death.
 
 ...you have ever found the latch on the ferret cage "accidentally" left
    open.
 
 ...you find your ferret stowing away in secret compartments under the
    floor of your car or gym bag.
 
 ...George Lucas' lawyers contact you about copyright infringement.
 
Gotta stop and do some real work now.  Don't forget to download your
copy of the Ferret Poem Book, its for the shelters.
 
            Bryan P. Coffey - Boston, MA
  & the Weasel Warriors - Albi, Esef, Merri, and Mint
       http://www.gis.net/~bpcoffey/furball.html
[Posted in FML issue 2676]