Greetings,
 
We are getting very fed up with our human.  Once again he is trying to quit
that nasty habit of slowly poisoning his body by sucking smoke from those
little, long, skinny cylinder thingies.  And we're really happy for him for
trying to quit.  We hate it when he smokes.  The smoke is nasty and it makes
our human smell bad.  He may not notice it, but our super weezil noses sure
do.  We make him go outside to smoke so we don't have to breathe the
nastiness.  And he wonders why we steal his packs whenever we get a chance
and hide them.
 
But even though we're glad he's quitting, this whole process is becoming
rather exasperating.  We are doing our best to keep him happy and help out
as much as possible.  After all it's in our job description.  We've been
getting into extra amounts of mischief so he will keep busy keeping us out
of trouble and keep his mind off smoking.  This quickly becomes tiring.
Humans just don't realize and appreciate the energy involved in causing
mischief.  They just think we do it for fun.  This also takes away from our
personal playtime, which is very hard on a ferret.  All this is fairly
tolerable, but the last straw came yesterday when our human picked Ricochet
up, stuck his nose in his mouth, and tried to light his tail!  Now, we
usually bend over backwards to help our human out, but this has definitely
crossed the line!  So, if any of you ferrets out there know how to deal with
a human who's quitting smoking, let us know.
 
The Weasels
   -the exasperated Insanity
   -the slightly scorched Ricochet
   -the annoyed Turbo
   -the fed up Mr. Lugnut Chains
[Posted in FML issue 2291]