CONAN'S VOWS:
 
I, Conan the Large, take you, Rosie the Sweet, to be my awful webbed wife.
I promise to honor you & cherrysh you & share all my raisins with you
forevermore.  I'll dance with you and teach you to play Ride the Cat and
show you where Ma keeps her socks and how to climb into the kitchern
drawas... I'll snuggle with you only and love with you and make you laugh *
keep you safe from people from California & happy forever.  I love you
hunnybunfert (gorsh).
 
Your everloving loverfert,
CONAN
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Me, Rosie, take you Conan my barbarian, to be my man-type-fert... I pawmiss
to show you how to climb the bookcases, dig the plants, give good kisses,
knock the alarm clock on the floor, beg for attention, and to wake up Mom
and Dad by biting their feet... I furder pawmiss, to show you how to be the
boss of the household, and to lick the water of off Mom and Dad's feet when
they get out of the shower... And how to swim like a river otter in the bath
tub... From dis day forward, I gives you my paw to be companions forever and
ever, Amen!
 
(Very sincere eyes),
Rosie
[Posted in FML issue 1679]