::bending over shoving butt in your face::

Will you? No? How 'bout you? No? You? Oh come on! Can someone PLEASE
massage my butt!!!!!

I've been sitting at the computer off and on for two days now looking
at birthday cards! Ouch ouch OUCH. Please someone help me! I need
"lots" of help. And I really thought I could count on you. At least BIG
(ooo what a visual!). So apparently, I"m worthy of birthday wishes, but
no one wants to be accountable for the results of those wishes? Ferret
people are the most irresponsible, mischievous, and crazy ... wait, or
is that their ferrets. ::scratching my head, then remembering it is my
butt that hurts and then rubbing that instead::

In all seriousness, thank you. I've never seen anything like this. I
don't know what to do. I don't know what to say. I'm just in awe of
how generous ferret people are.

The morning of my birthday, I rolled over and wondered if I really did
want to get up that day. Everyone here was either working or at school.
I was alone. It was dark and rainy. And I was battling thoughts about
the recent loss of my mother. Then I rolled over and saw my Blackberry
flashing, flashing, flashing. The thought of laying in bed, reading
email there rather than getting up, facing the day, and sitting at my
computer was VERY appealing. I picked up my phone and clicked on my
email. And the box that I had practically emptied the day before was
chock full of emails. Then it starting adding more. The emails started
to register one by one and stacking on top of one another in my
blackberry box. Tick, tick, tick, tick. Omg. Was it ever going to end?
What is going on?! It finally stopped. And I saw birthday wishes.
Birthday wishes from dear friends, and even people that I barely knew!
I also saw condolences sprinkled in between. So I wiped my eyes, and
began reading. After a few, I had a smile on my face and the strength
to get out of bed. I began my day at the computer. Looking at cards,
with funny music, balloons, spiked haired ferrets, Hoops and Yoyo,
and letters with kind thoughts from people.

I will admit, I got overwhelmed and stopped. I started to cry. How
was I ever to thank everyone? And what did ever do to deserve this?
Everyone has birthdays. And so many of you have lost loved ones. Some
of you have lost "several" loved ones all in one year. I've only lost
one family member, and one friend in my entire life. And this last
one, although special and hard to take, was something many of you have
already faced. It's incredible to me that people who've suffered so
much in the past, dug so deep to take time to think about me. But see,
you all are incredible. That's the thing.

I know I've been very reserved on the FML for almost two years now. I
think many of you will understand when I say I've been feeling a little
"burned out" even though ferrets are the top passion in my life. So
I've stepped back a tad so the little buggers won't suck the very life
out of me as these vampires are known to do. I think thats why I've
been able to welcome and love so many little souls for decades in my
life. Anyway, I've not been my witty self for quite some time because
of this, but I now realize that was no reason to step back into the
shadows. I am going to try to contribute and be more active here no
matter how lame it is. Just be prepared because I'm taking a mental
break from life with ferrets and am more reserved, so communication
will be ... well, lame. Not just because of my "break" but because
family life just really takes up so much of my time anymore.

But see YOU are family. I've never forgotten that. But I have to wonder
if I wasn't remiss at times in showing that. You all helped me raise my
autistic son from afar and I'll never forget that. You endure endless
yammering about my crazy family. And you've sat through posts and
emails that are triple this length. Um. The more I think about it,
the more you've put up with and I cant' even list it all!! LOL!

So, I"m starting with todays contribution to the FML. I am offering up
my butt.


ps, I am not forty. I'm a few years older. But last night, my husband,
Scott told me he's been with me for 29 birthdays. I'm thinking that in
light of that, only 29 then matter. Yah, thats the ticket. I'll take
that! I'm 29!

pss (is there such a thing?) it's going to take quite a while to reply
to the wonderful letters, I hope you don't mind too much.

[Posted in FML 6259]