Hello everyone,
 
Well this is the e-mail I knew I'd be writing some day, but that fact
doesn't seem to make it any more bearable.  This morning our sweet Miss
Dena crossed the bridge after a long battle with insulinoma.
 
Dena came to our house from a shelter.  She was found outside in the
wintertime.  The vet guessed her age at that time to be about 2 years old.
I fell in love with her the first time I saw her, at the shelter her name
was Dana and her sweet disposition reminded me of my brother's girlfriend
Dana.  When we finally brought her home with us we found out she did *not*
like men.  She took every chance available to bite daddy, usually striking
faster than a cobra and then disappearing.  As time passed I was the only
person who could hold her without getting bitten, then we found out why she
was such a grump.  After getting her right canine tooth which was cracked
removed suddenly we had an angel.  Worst of all now she preferred dad to
mom!  (ok, maybe worst of all just for me, I liked being the one she came
to for loves)  It didn't take long for her to wrap daddy around her little
finger.
 
When we found out she had insulinoma it broke our hearts.  At the time we
had 8 ferrets but Dena had a very special place in our hearts.  She was a
true lap ferret and if that wasn't good enough she also had a 100% hit rate
in the litter box, never tried to get into anything she wasn't supposed to
(with the exception of being crazy for Pepsi).  We decided to let her be
out of the cage and be a house ferret because she never gave us a moment
of worry and she seemed to be stressed living with the rest of the kids.
Big mistake!  No she never did anything bad but man oh man did *WE* get
trained!  She learned to knock on the bathroom door if we were rude
enough to change it, she supervised the washing of dishes and laundry and
generally ran our lives if she was awake.  She had many looks and we knew
just what she wanted by the way she was looking at us.  Goodness forbid we
didn't notice her at our feet...oh dear...the cold shoulder was the worst.
 
Last week she started going downhill and we knew it wouldn't be long.  We
moved her litter box closer to her "nest" but she still insisted on walking
to where it used to be.  Eventually it got to where she couldn't walk that
far.  She wanted to be held a lot and I turned into a kangaroo for her.
She seemed to enjoy the pouch I made for her in my shirt and didn't mind
walking around the house with me, of course I still got a look if I didn't
pet her enough.  Last night she came out for one last time.  Dad told me
she was at his feet and I asked him what she was doing, he said just
looking at me (he never did learn to read her looks), I told him she just
wanted to be held.  He picked her up and held her and then I held her, she
didn't want to be held for but a few minutes which was a change for the
hours she had wanted to be held in previous days.  I knew then that she
was saying goodbye.  She attempted to get down but she had no strength so
I put her back in her special blanket.  She snuggled down deep inside them
and seemed content.  This morning when we got up she put her head out one
last time to see us and then crossed the bridge.
 
It still doesn't seem real and I keep expecting to look down and see her
looking at me wanting to be held.  We are going to bury her someplace nice
up at our special mountain with her blanket.  I know she is happier now,
feeling no pain but that doesn't seem to help this hole in my heart.  It
broke my heart this morning as dad was holding his special girl and he
broke down crying "my baby is gone".
 
Dena angel, you really are an angel now.  We miss you like crazy little
girl but we are glad you were finally ready to cross the bridge.  You don't
have to play with the other kids if you don't want to but just for mom and
all the times I let you boss me around, do you think you could try just
once to see if you like it?  We love you little one and we'll see you when
we get there.
 
Carrie & Vincent and the remaining 6
[Posted in FML issue 3203]