_____TP Fiasco:
I put Pogo2 in the bathroom to run around while I ate, seeing as how my
house is still such a mess from when I went on that trip (in other words,
it's temporarily un-fert-proofed).  Halfway through my pork chops, I heard
this *thud*.
 
Being suspicious about what trouble Pogo2 could've gotten into in the
fert-proofed bathroom, I peeked in (still chewing food) to find Pogo2
Staring at the ground on a 3-inch pile of toilet paper.  She wouldn't
look at me, so I think she knew she did something bad.  (Anybody else's
fert do that?)  Anyway, I put her in her cage.  (She does know not to
climb the toilet paper.) And next comes:
 
_____Food Digger:
Right as I sat back down to the table and lifted the fork to my mouth, I
hear this irritating <digdigdig>.  So, since she knows better than to dig
in her food, I spray her with a little water.  She climbs in her hammock.
I sit back down. <DigDigDig!>  I take her out and do her more powerful
punishment (I blow[about medium-strength] in her face.).  Then put her
back.
 
No sooner than I turn around, I hear this awful <DIG!DIG!DIG!> so jump
up and thump the metal tray under her cage (it makes a loud noise that
distracts her) and she still keeps on.  How can I solve this?  She *knows*
it's wrong (or at least not to let me see her digging).  No matter how much
food I put in there, she digs, wasting a LOT of food.  She has been through
half of a 3lb bag of Kaytee.  She just switched to it this week, and that
is how much food she has wasted, and I even put the scattered (clean)
remains back in her bowl.
 
_____Backbone Baldness:
Last night I also gave her a bath, and to my surprise, she has these
humongous bald spots in her undercoat.  She is only a few mo. old, so I
don't think it's adrenal.  She's not shedding.  Any help appreciated.
 
_____Smelling Good!!:
When I washed her last night, I used her regular shampoo, my human
conditioner afterwards, and after she dried off, I lathered her down with
cocoa butter lotion.  She smells good, her fur is *Much* softer, and her
skin isn't dry.
 
BTW, these are all products that I know she isn't allergic to.
 
Jen & Pogo2, the Imposter(but fitting in)
toilet-brush-attacking-super-ferret-from-Mars
[Posted in FML issue 2633]