Finally, after years of trying, the humans finally managed to take back
the house and outnumber the furballs living here.  At normal levels the
Matlick house consists of the following:
 
Ferrets: 3 - Dubs, Arcas, Orlando
 
Cats: 3 - Ghost, Freyr, Seti
 
Humans: 2 - Chris & Chad
 
However, this past weekend the humans asserted their rights, gathered in
numbers and took back the house.  This did not impress the ferrets or the
cats.  I found this list tucked into the sleeping box behind the sofa in
the ferret room.
 
Act of Aggression 1: Humans clean out ferret stash under dresser
 
Act of Aggression 2: Humans scour and clean ferret room, removing all
stashes for cleaning
 
Act of Aggression 3: Humans banish Dubs to 3rd floor bathroom instead of
kitchen
 
Act of Aggression 4: Humans scrub kitchen and remove Dubs' "landing
strips of scent" (human note: Dubs is blind)
 
Act of Aggression 5: Humans banish Arcas & Orlando from 3rd floor
 
You can probably see where this is going.  The above list is only from
before the reinforcement humans arrived.  The reinforcements arrived in
two groups.  Group one consisting of (from the furballs' point of view)
Grandma & Grandpa Matlick, small loud, fast small child referred to as
Bronwyn (note: niece aged 3).
 
Act of Aggression 6: Humans refuse to let ferrets out of imprisonment of
ferret room.
 
Act of Aggression 7: All interesting things began to occur outside of
said ferret room, Humans still refused to allow ferrets to participate.
 
Act of Aggression8: Dubs repetitively roused from beauty sleep by small
child (accompanied by large humans) saying "Baby Dubs, she's not gonna
hurt ya".
 
The second reinforcements arrived.  This stage of human invasion
consisted of (from the furballs' point of view) Uncle Brian, Aunt
Crissy and very small, non-vocal child referred to as Quinn (nephew,
aged 4 months).
 
The ferrets added no more acts of aggression at this point, as I suspect,
in hindsight they were consulting with the cats (typically referred to
as the "stupid cats") to create a counter attack against the invading
human forces.  I'm not certain how this occurred as I observed that Seti
spent most of the time under our bed and Ghost completely disappeared.
Freyr would appear briefly, survey and return upstairs.  I suppose he
must have been on recon assignment.
 
With the reinforcement human forces leaving (or being driven off
depending on your point of view) the remaining humans, outnumbered as
we are, await full retaliation from the furballs.  This generally (from
our experience) comes in the way of spite pooties.  I've stocked up on
paper towels and carpet cleaner.
 
Chris, in WV with the furballs
[Posted in FML issue 4945]