..while owning ferrets.
 1) Ferret Juggling, the fine art of holding three squirming ferrets
    in two hands.
 2) How to turn the door knob with my mouth.
 3) Ferret Soccer, the fine art of kicking (gently) ferrets away
    from an open door (Pele, top THAT!!!)
 4) Where every hole in the house left by the cabinet makers/
    construction crew is located.
 5) Basic construction, learned while sealing every hole left by....
 6) How to translate ferretese: what all those hisses, chuckles,
    squeeks and barks mean.  (A note to all my Zoology compatriots who say
    that animals communicate but have no structured language, I say, "You
    haven't been listening closely!")
 7) That all the books are wrong, that ferrets are really EXCELLENT
    climbers.  It's the downclimbing they suck swampwater at doing!!!
 8) Pain is just a state of mind (no brain, no pain.) "Dookadooka,
    dookadookdookdookdookdoook" <translation:"Who moved the floor????">
 9) That the wiggling toes of a sock clad foot is a ferret
    declaration of war.
10) How to make a bed with military corners that you can bounce a
    quarter off of....with three squirming lumps in the middle!
[Posted in FML issue 1634]