[Multi-part post combined.  BIG]
 
JENNIFER WRITES:
>By now, many of you have read about the 'not so pleasant' experiences
>I've encountered lately from several Washington State ferret shelters
>when attempting to find a new companion for my Snowball.  I've attached
>below a summary of the UN-solicited email from one of the WA ferret
>shelter operators but can't reprint on the FML the email word for word,
>due to copyright laws and privacy reasons . . . .  So it's edited and
>summarized but I've tried to leave as much as the author's "intent" as
>possible so you get an idea of what I'm up against.
>
>I find it rather interesting that this shelter operator managed to save
>all of my email communication and will readily send it out to anyone,
>upon their request,
 
First - let me say that there is much much more to this story than what
Jennifer is telling.  It is far too involved to repeat in short postings
on a listserve but I am more than willing to tell the story to anyone who
wants to call or email me privately.
 
I'd like to start out by saying that Jennifer's statement about
copywright law is ridiculous and I repeat, anyone who wants to know the
whole story about Phoebe's adoption is welcome to read the entire email
chain.  It's all very self explanatory.  And if Jennifer means what she
says about having nothing to hide, she could also send her part of the
conversation.  I don't particulary feel the need to defend myself but I
do think that everyone deserves to hear both sides.  Jennifer makes alot
of assumptions in her post and speaks about situations that she really
doesn't have any first hand knowledge.  I save all of my paperwork,
emails and anything else that pertains to a legal or business issue that
might come back to haunt me later.  I don't like getting involved in a,
he said-she said, argument so if I have the facts to back it up, I prefer
that people read them and form their own opinions.  Jennifer often
mistakes her opinions and presents them as "facts" in my experience
with her.  [Moderator's note: I told Jennifer she couldn't post due
to copyright rules... it was not her decision.  BIG]
 
I'm sure I don't have to explain to most shelter operators about how
hard it is to screen for adoptions but this statement I made the other
day explains the problem, "I turned down an adoption which made the
dad mad but I really felt it was best for the ferret.  People take it
personally and it really isn't - because all I have to go on is a very
short time of meeting someone, asking the right questions and then making
a decision based on their answers and my intuition.  Not much, is it?"
Additionally, many shelters do tend to communcate their experiences to
other shelters, whether good or bad.  Anyone who knows me, knows that
WFRS and LDFR are not good friends.  But it doesn't stop me from sharing
my experiences with them and they have been very polite and appreciative.
For me, it makes no difference if the ferret belongs to LDFR or not, I
would be sick to my stomach if I knew I could have prevented a bad
adoption for another shelter and didn't step forward.  I don't expect any
other shelter to make a decision based on my experiences.  I just share
them.  That's all.
 
JENNIFER WRITES:
>but she could never manage to email me or snail mail me any financial
>support for Phoebe while Phoebe was still considered a foster in my home
>(per the shelter's foster agreement that I helped revise); nor did she
>ever send me an adoption contract to sign OR send on the gifts to Phoebe
>that she told me were sent to her from someone who adopted Phoebe on the
>2004 Christmas Giving Tree.  (keep in mind I only live 30 min. away from
>this shelter).  What I don't understand is why Phoebe was even LISTED on
>the tree when, by December of '04, the shelter operator had these emails
>dated from OCTOBER which clearly stated my desire & intention to
>officially adopt Phoebe at that time.
 
Jennifer has twisted so much of this conversation I don't even want to
address it.  Just know that the gifts that were sent for Phoebe were
given to other needy shelter kids at Jennifer's request.  (email
available upon request).  Phoebe was listed on the Giving Tree so that
as a foster mom, Jennifer would have a few nice things for her.  In an
email dated Nov 30th, (not Oct) Jennifer wrote, "I'm sure you've figured
out by now that I have decided to keep Phoebe," (email available) And
that was how I was officially told (not asked) that she wanted to adopt
her.  I also made it clear to Jennifer that as a foster mom, LDFR would
pay for all of Phoebe's medical expenses providing she took her to the
vet that was working with the shelter to keep the cost down.  Again, all
emails referencing these conversations are available to anyone who is
interested, especially a shelter considering adoption.
 
JENNIFER WRITES:
>In the same breath, this person says, "I think you are a fine ferret
>owner and very responsible" but goes on to explain that the reason she
>will never adopt to me again is because I already have a senior ferret
>(Snowball) and she thinks that if/when the NEXT senior ferret I adopt
>becomes a similar situation as Phoebe's that I will just bring the
>ferret back to her again.  (NOT true or I would have done that with both
>Sasha AND Snowball already!  WHATEVER!!)
 
What concerned me was her email that said she would never surrender "her"
ferrets (Snowball and Sasha).  After she adopted Phoebe, I assumed that
she was also "her" ferret.  I have never had an answer to my question.
Why would she still continue to care for Sasha and Snowball until the end
of life regardless of the time, effort, financial stress it would place
on her but not Phoebe?  Why did Phoebe deserve less than Snowball or
Sasha?  If she adopts another ferret that becomes ill, will it come back
too?  Is there any other shelter that would not have this same concern
if they adopted another elderly ferret out to the same person who just
brought one back?
 
JENNIFER WRITES:
>Finally she says that she can't blame the other shelters for being
>afraid either because they all love their ferrets way too much to take
>that chance.  Once is enough.  (WOW - even convicted criminals are
>protected by the THREE STRIKES LAW!)
 
Personally, I would rather not take a chance with the life of a second
ferret.  Once is more than enough.   I think that speaks for itself.
 
JENNIFER WRITES:
>Please be patient with me as I attempt to provide clarification to those
>who are interested in knowing the details surrounding my experience with
>Phoebe, the ferret I originally fostered then eventually adopted from
>Little Dudes Ferret Ranch (LDFR) in WA state last year.  Since the
>shelter operator has cited this situation as the reason she believes I
>am an "unfit" ferret parent and will not adopt to me ever again, I
>believe it is only fair for the 'ferret community' to know ow
>"irresponsible" I am before anyone decides whether or not I am worthy
>of adopting from their shelter in the future, as I seek out a companion
>for Snowball.
 
I realize that Jennifer is not happy with my decision but I stand by it.
If her reason for returning Phoebe was because she was too ill to care
for her, took up too much time and money, affected her job, etc., why
does she think it won't happen again?  As a shelter mom, I live it every
day.  Senior ferrets get sick.  They take money and time and effort and
lots and lots of care.  There is no way to provide a guarantee to
Jennifer that she won't get another one who will take the same level of
care.  I just can't take that chance and I think that anyone who
considers adopting a senior ferret to her should be aware of it.
However, for the record, she is an extremely responsible ferret owner -
up until they pass the point of being time consuming when ill - and I
know this from experience.  I would recommend that anyone adopt a younger
ferret out to her even though I would be somewhat concerned as it grows
old and sick.  Which it will.
 
JENNIFER WRITES:
>... but I also don't believe that shelters have the right to play GOD
>either and have sole and absolute authority to discriminate against
>anyone for any reason whenever they wish!  Ferrets (and all animals)
>are living creatures, not PROPERTY that shelters OWN!!
 
Unfortunately, Shelter Moms do play God.  That is the most uncomfortable
and sickening part of sheltering.  We are only human and try to do the
best we can.  Maybe we occasionally lose good homes but only in the
spirit of trying to be as safe as possible.  Another part of playing
"God" is when we have to decide when it's time for them to die.  Anyone
who has had to make that decision for their own pet has an understanding
of what it feels like.  Causing an animal's death on purpose is not a
feeling that ever gets reconciled inside.  No matter how right the
decision was.
 
JENNIFER WRITES:
Phoebe's story:
>Ms. Noren says that "Senior ferrets don't do well when they have to
>change homes".  No, REALLY?  Hmm.... maybe that's why I waited so long
>before deciding to bring Phoebe back!  HELLO!  So basically Ms. Noren
>really does believe that Phoebe would have been better off not coming to
>my home for 10 months to get the specialized care she did because the
>"uprooting" was too much for her at her age and that Phoebe would have
>been given FAR BETTER CARE AND INDIVIDUAL ATTENTION at her shelter -
>YEAH, RIGHT!!!!!  Phoebe would have NEVER EVER received feedings every
>four hours and food/meds at 2 am and Ms. Noren would NEVER have been
>able to go home on her lunch hour to care for Phoebe b/c she worked too
>far away from her home!!!!!
 
She's missing the point here.  I'm not here to make it comfortable for
HER.  I'm here to do the best I can in placing ferrets in loving, caring,
responsible and especially - forever homes.  When you take a senior
ferret as a foster, and then adopt it, it is supposed to be until the
end of life.  I realize that things happen and ferrets get returned but
I will repeat the concern I mentioned earlier - why did Jennifer return
Phoebe but state adamantly that she would never even consider
surrendering Sasha or Snowball if they were to become ill.  I think
Phoebe deserved better than that.
 
JENNIFER WRITES:
>According to the LDFR shelter website, Phoebe has since passed away -
>AT THE SHELTER and not at my home.  I can't help but ask the question -
>"Terri, if Phoebe (and other seniors) are better off at YOUR shelter and
>not in a home, then how come Phoebe died while in YOUR care and not
>mine?  Was it really from the trauma of being re-homed and then
>returned?" REALLY?
 
This is a rather strange question to me.  I consider myself a pretty
knowledgable and experienced shelter mom.  Even so, ferrets actually die
here at the shelter.  When they are ready to go, I just don't seem to
have the power to stop it from happening.  Has any shelter ever not had a
ferret die as they age and develop illness and disease?  Any luck keeping
them going forever?  I don't think so.  Dying is part of living.  Anyone
who disputes that I would think, is not dealing with reality.  To date,
since LDFR opened in May 2004, we have had 20 ferrets pass away.  7 of
them were at the shelter.  The rest were in foster care - as was Phoebe
when she passed away.  Some of you may know Kim and Reggie of the FBR
Gang.  They dedicated their lives to caring for terminally ill and
elderly ferrets.  This is where Phoebe lived out the remainder of her
life.  God rest her soul.  Her foster mom kept her until her bad days
outnumbered her good days and the Dr. helped her pass quietly.  All
expenses paid by LDFR except food and litter.
 
Obviously and ideally, ferrets will thrive much better in a home than a
shelter - unless the ferret is being moved around.  If stability can only
be provided by a shelter, than maybe that's where it needs to stay.
 
Please accept my apology for so many postings and cluttering up the FML.
I said my piece publicly so if anyone would like more information, please
email me privately.
 
JENNIFER WRITES:
>To all of you SHELTERS:
>I am NOT a ferret shelter and have never taken an oath that says I MUST
>care for ALL ferrets no matter what the cost to my health and finances
>(as some shelter operators operate).  We all know that there are MANY
>ferret owners out there who have returned their ferret(s) to a shelter
>without even shedding a tear b/c they just didn't want to bother with
>the ferret anymore and took the 'easy way out'!  I NEVER EVER took the
>'easy way out' with Phoebe!  If that was the case, I would have returned
>her much earlier than I did and saved myself ALOT of money, grief, and
>tears!!!
 
All I can say is one more time - it's not about you.  It's about the
ferrets.  Just because you have had a bad experience, doesn't mean
everyone has.  From what I have seen in my dealings with the public is
that the only people who tend to vent and cause public scenes are those
who feel they have been wronged by being denied something that they want.
LDFR has adopted out 104 ferrets since May 2004 and I am still in contact
with many of them.  We have had 42 elderly/ill ferrets in permanent
foster care of which 13 have passed away from their illness.  29 of them
remain in foster care.  We provided boarding service 38 times of which
many were repeat clients, I'm assuming because they were happy with their
experience here.  Adoptive and foster homes alike, all seem happy and
satisfied.  Considering that many of the other shelters have been
operating for many years with hundreds of adoptions, not everyone is
being treated badly.
 
Even so, we just can't make everyone happy.  I'm sure Jennifer is not the
only person who feels she was treated unfairly although Jennifer's issue
with LDFR goes beyond her foster/adoptive experience.  That said, I hope
Jennifer can move on and stop berating the shelters.  I personally don't
want to see any of the ferrets at any of the shelters lose out on a good
home while she continues to go on about her injustices.
 
Lastly - bashing shelters anywhere for any reason publicly is wrong.  And
I say that because I did the same thing when I was upset about my own
experience a few years back.  It doesn't help the ferrets.  No matter
how mad you are at the people running the shelters, it ultimately affects
the animals in the end.  If I close down because I lose adoptions, who
suffers?  I have the lowest number of ferrets now at 39 who are actually
AT the shelter than I've had in two years.  28 of them are old and sick.
29 more are old and sick in foster care.  That's 57 old, sick and very
costly ferrets who belong to LDFR.  Which shelter out there would like to
take them?  We are not perfect and yes we get annoyed at people and yes
we aren't as polite as we could be.  But honestly, did Jennifer really
stop to think about what she is trying to accomplish by venting here?
Most everything I read that she posted talks about how this has affected
HER and these are the typical conversations I have had with her in the
past.  Well - it's just not about "her" or anyone else.  First and
foremost I want what's best for the ferrets.  It's that simple.  I'm
sorry if anyone gets their feelings hurt in the process but sometimes
that's just the way it has to be.
[Posted in FML issue 5210]