Dear Ferret Folks-
 
I have been asked to re-post the story of my sister's prospective
husbands' introduction to the world of ferrets.  In light of recent
developments, it seems appropriate to do so.  Not only did she marry
the young man, I am delighted to announce that they are expecting their
first baby!  I am going to be Aunt Alexandra in Massachusetts.  I know
that he will be a good daddy.
 
*******************************************************
Dear Ferret Folks-
 
Recently my little sister (29, but always little to me) became engaged to
a very nice young man.  They always seem nice, at first.  But you never
know.
 
I decided to test him.  I left him alone in the ferret's room with
Sabrina the Bat-Biter and her young friend Switch the Kit.  He had never
been alone with ferrets before.  He had seen mine from a distance, but
this was new.  I moved down the hall to the computer room, left the door
open a crack, and got on-line.  All the while I was checking my e-mail I
was listening.
 
After about three minutes I heard the crackle-crackle of a two handled
plastic bag, one of the ladies favorite toys.  Then a bit later I heard
the distinctive rustling sound of the huge, empty twenty pound bag of cat
food that I keep on their floor.  ("Special-Kitty" brand from Wal-Mart,
my dog loves this brand above all others.  She is special indeed, and
disdains dog food.)  They dearly love their empty cat food bag.  It
smells good and two can hide inside of it together.  Best of all, it
makes really cool noises if a human grabs a corner and gives it a good
shaking.  I was hearing that noise.
 
So far, so good.  it sounded as though the ladies were teaching him how
to play quite effectively.
 
Finally, I heard something that baffled me.  Muffled shouting that
sounded like a man's high pitched, falsetto voice yelling "Weekie-weekie!
Weekie-weekie!" I hustled myself down the hall thinking "Oh, my GOD, WHAT
HAVE YOU WEASLES DONE TO THE BOYFRIEND!?"
 
Imagine this.  A six-foot four man sitting cross-legged on the floor of
the ferret's room, surrounded by fur mice and little plastic balls with
bells inside.  Apparently attached to his face is a flexible silver
dryer-vent hose, maybe five or six feet long.  It hangs down to the
floor and is thrashing vigorously, seemingly alive like some psychedelic
elephant's trunk in great distress.  His eyes closed, his whole face
scrunched up with effort, he is bellowing "Weekie-weekie!
Weekie-weekie!" down the hose to the now potentially deaf ferret inside
who is just LOVING this.
 
O.K.  He passed the test.  She can keep him.
 
Sincerely,
Alexandra in Massachusetts
 
Switch the Kit: "What does 'Weekie-weekie' mean, aunt Sabrina?"
Sabrina the Bat-Biter: "I can't heeeeaaar youuu!"
[(Originally) Posted in FML issue 3676]
[Posted in FML issue 3902]