The Twelve Ferrets of Christmas
(Or What Did I. Ever Do to You?)
 
On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me
a ferret and a pear tree
 
On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
2 ferrets sneezing, and a ferret that is now
climbing up the pear tree
 
On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me
3 ferrets sleeping,
2 ferrets sneezing, and a ferret playing peek-a-boo
in the pear tree
 
On the fourth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
4 ferrets frolicking,
3 ferrets sleeping, 2 ferrets sneezing,
and a ferret looking around in the poor pear tree
 
On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
5 ferrets missing their litter box,
4 ferret frolicking, 3 ferrets sleeping,
2 ferrets sneezing,
And now what is that ferret doing in that pear tree.
 
On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
6 ferrets slinking,
5 ferrets still not any closer to their litter box,
4 ferrets frolicking, 3 ferrets sleeping, 2 ferrets sneezing,
and I'm starting to wonder about that ferret in that pear tree.
 
On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me
7 ferrets Dooking, 6 ferrets slinking,
5 ferrets who had better find their litter box,
4 ferrets frolicking, 3 ferrets sleeping, 2 ferrets sneezing,
And now I'm worried about that ferret up in that old pear tree.
 
On the eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
8 ferrets yawning, 7 ferrets Dooking, 6 ferrets slinking,
5 ferrets who had better find out how to use their litter box,
4 ferrets frolicking, 3 ferrets sleeping, 2 ferrets sneezing,
And I have lost sight of the ferret up in the pear tree.
 
On the ninth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
9 ferrets sock stealing, 8 ferrets yawning,
7 ferrets Dooking, 6 ferrets slinking,
5 ferrets now sleeping in their litter box, 4 ferrets frolicking,
3 ferrets sleeping, 2 ferrets sneezing,
And now that ferret is looking for a pear in the poor pear tree.
 
On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
10 ferrets tussling, 9 ferrets sock stealing, 8 ferrets yawning,
7 ferrets Dooking, 6 ferrets slinking,
5 ferrets who are now playing in their litter box,
4 ferrets frolicking, 3 ferrets sleeping, 2 ferrets sneezing,
I'll be darned that ferret found a pear in the old pear tree.
 
On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me
11 ferrets dancing 10 ferrets tussling, 9 ferrets sock stealing,
8 ferrets yawning, 7 ferrets Dooking, 6 ferrets slinking,
5 ferrets who still haven't a clue what to do in their litter box,
4 ferrets frolicking, 3 ferrets sleeping, 2 ferrets sneezing
And that ferret is eating his pear up in the pear tree.
 
On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
12 ferrets leaping, 11 ferrets dancing 10 ferrets tussling,
9 ferrets sock stealing, 8 ferrets yawning,
7 ferrets Dooking, 6 ferrets slinking,
5 ferrets who finally used their litter box, HURRAY
4 ferrets frolicking, 3 ferrets sleeping, 2 ferrets sneezing
Now where has that ferret gone and hide that poor pear tree?
 
 
A Ferrets Christmas Song
 
Ferrets getting toasty by an open fire,
Chasing nipping at your toes
Yule tide ferrets tangled up in the bows
And what they'll do next no one knows
 
Everybody knows a ferret kiss under the mistletoe
Helps to make the season bright
Tiny kits with their eyes all a glow
Will hide the presents you put out to night
 
They know there's lot's of good stuff there.
And to keep it all wrapped up just isn't fair
 
Now every ferret-kit is gonna try
To get to everything, even what you put up high.
And so I'm offering this simple prayer
To ferrets rather you've got one or 42
Although it's been said many times, many ways--
Stay out of that darn Christmas tree, won't you.
 
 
Jingling Ferret
 
Jingling Ferret
Jingling Ferret
Jingling everyday
Oh how funny it is to see
a ferret jingle in this way
Jingling Ferret
Jingling Ferret
Jingling everyday
But soon it will pass
then at last he wont
jingle as he plays.
 
Now this is what happened you see
A bell fell from the tree
The ferret nabbed it before I could grab it
and under the couch he went yelling wheeeee
So I flipped the couch, only ferret could I see,
no bell was found
and then I heard the sound
of this coming from he
He was
Jingling Ferret
Jingling Ferret
Jingling everyday
Oh how funny it is to see a
ferret jingle in this way
he was
Jingling ferret
Jingling Ferret
Jingling everyday
soon it will pass
then he at last wont
jingle when he plays.
 
This song is only for fun
 
Needless to say we do not indorse feed your ferret a bell, and in fact
this can show some of the dangers of tree ornaments and our fuzzies.
Have a very merry Christmas, and please make it a safe one
 
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[Posted in FML issue 2788]