Hummer hewe!  Me mom's (mom is most buutefulest mom in da hole wowld!)
favowite fewwet of da ten her has.  Us fewwets likes to helps mom all da
time.
 
We fewwets helps mom keep da floors cleen, cuz after we use da box or
paper to poop, we wipes our hairy butts on da floor and helps cleen it
up!  Dat be vewy nice of us, dont u tink?
 
Oh yeah, and we helps mom cleen out our food dishes.  U wants to know
how?  When we be eatin, we get da food in our moufs and chew it all up
over da floor.  Dat way da wittle peeces of food gets on da floor an not
in da food dish.  See, now mom not has to cleen out food dish as much an
der be food on floor for da doggies!
 
We also helps mom keep da dogs entrtaned [vewy good word!].  If da dogs
be in a woom wit da door closed, we stiks our paws & noses under da door
to let da doggies know dat it be okay.  Da doggies tank us by jumpin on
da door, scwatchin at da cawpet & bawking.  [Dey bawk loud!] Me tinks dis
be one of da best ways we fewwets helps mom.  Da doggies get exewsise,
mom gets exewsise when her runs to da door & we wuns thru da door when
mom opens it to let out da dogs!
 
Aaaaaaand, da best of awl!  We helps mom cleen da vewy top of her
clawset.  We has to use our claws & clim up her dwesses & sweaters to get
to da top, but it be worf it to her to get all da stuff on da top shelf
dusted off & reawwanged.
 
Debbie Whorley
[Posted in FML issue 4933]