Whew!  At least I got all the topics onto the subject line.
 
URI (upper respiratory illness): If they get it, give them pedialyte in
place of water, pediatric benadryl if they're stuffy, and amoxicillin if
your vet recommends it.  Best is to keep them from getting it by washing
your hands before handling ferrets, not sneezing around them, and no kisses!
That worked for me this year.  Also, if one ferret gets it, sure enough they
all will eventually.
 
Road trips: Others will tell you about keeping the ferrets cool, etc., but
my best suggestion is that you use this list to find ferret people along the
way, at least one per day, who have a ferret-proof room and will let you
stop by and turn your guys loose for a bit.  If there are already ferrets
in the room, so much the better :-)
 
Dumpster diving: This is a cautionary tale involving bright red poop, lots
of it.  Ferrari, my longest and therefore tallest when he chooses to get
vertical, is the only guy who can reach the lid of the kitchen trash to
knock it off.  I've kind of been letting him get away with it, since all he
does is rattle around and compact the trash a bit, but I'm also careful not
to throw anything dangerous in the trash (you know you're a ferret person
when you worry about what you throw in your own trash).  Well, a week ago I
brought home a container of cut watermelon from the store.  Only 49 cents
for a pound -- it looked so good!  Turned out to be fermented and for 49
cents it wasn't worth the trip back to the store.  So, although I might
have heard a slight whispering in my ear to the contrary, I pitched it,
sealed container and all, in the trash.  Woke the next morning, yawned and
stretched (learned that from the ferrets), opened my eyes, and saw LOTS of
piles of BRIGHT RED poop all over.  Ferrari was apparently fine, but he'd
eaten and processed that whole pound of fermented watermelon while I slept.
He's probably wondering when I'll bring him some more.  Moral: if your
ferrets can access your trash, be careful what you put there.
 
Marionette: I was playing with Mr. F the other night and he was trying to
jump up and grab a sock I dangled just out of his reach.  Finally, he got a
lock on it.  I mean a real lock, like he wasn't planning to let go this
century.  Just for kicks I tried dancing him around the room like a
marionette, and the effect was quite authentic.  Left foot here, right foot
there, la-di-da-di-da.  The other weasels quite enjoyed the performance.
F-Man got to keep the sock when it was over.
 
-- Kim, trying but never quite succeeding to be a perfect ferret mom
[Posted in FML issue 2304]