Got a handfull of e-mails asking me to discuss anal sacs and ferret stink.
(I have been wondering about the implications, but have decided to ignore
them.)
 
One of the defining characteristics of the Carnivora is that most, if not
all, of it's membership possesses a pair of anal sacs (AKA: anal glands,
tail glands) that reside between the external and internal anal sphincters
(The muscles that keep things watertight).  These glands are lined with
large sebaceous glands, and some carnivores also have apocrine glands within
the sac as well.  In the majority of the beasties that possess these unique
"business cards," the function of the sac is for identification.  Because of
the location of the outlet of the sac, as the animal does its business, a
little of the "Polecat Purfume" is also secreted, so the scat takes on an
odor unique to the individual.  This marks territory and defines boundaries.
(Those of you who have gone trampling through the woods have doubtless found
such signposts).  This is also why dogs, cats and ferrets will sniff at
_any_ pile they run across.  (Hum, smells like Bear's been here.  Eating too
many raisins, I see...)
 
In at least two families of carnivores, the Mustelidae and the Viveridae,
the anal sacs have taken on a new dimension; defense.  Some members, like
skunks, can tell you to go away with more than just body language.  Most
carnivores can do likewise, but in a much less dramatic fashion; they just
collapse the sacs and let what comes out come out.  Normally, this only
occurs when the animal is excited or scared.  Or trying to impress your new
landlord.
 
Sebaceous glands secrete sebum, a yellowish oily/fatty mixture, and apocrine
glands secrete a variety of things, including milk, sweat, and earwax (If
they secrete milk, we rename them a variety of things, and elevate their
status to the cult level.) The same type of glands found in the anal sac are
also found at the root of hair folicles; the apocrine gland's function is to
produce a cooling fluid, and the sebaceous gland's function is to produce a
protective oily coating for the skin and hair.  Ferrets lack sweat glands
over much of their body, so the sweat function is minimized.  Ferrets are
also somewhat aquatic; the webbed toes, lack of sweat glands, dense
underfur, and high production of sebum attest to that from a physiological
viewpoint.  As a consequence, the sebaceous glands function at a high level,
to keep the fur and skin watertight.
 
What this means is that unless you have a ferret with an infected, leaky or
chronically impacted anal sac, removing them will do absolutely nothing to
eliminate the musty odor they are so famous for, except empty your
pocketbook and hurt the ferret.  (They also said lopping off parts of baby
boys wasn't painful, but I don't see men lining up for the proceedure.  "Lop
it off, mate, and ferget the gas--I'm a real man!") Surgery hurts, even our
quiet little ferts--but they don't get many pain meds when the gas wears
off.  It should only be done when medically required.
 
The odor is in the skin and fur, so unless you want to shave your ferret and
make them walk around with a Saran Wrap bodysuit, they will always have
"that smell." If you remove the sebum, any soap or shampoo will work, the
sebaceous glands will only go into overtime to replace the lost oil from the
hair and skin, and make matters worse.
 
So here is your quiz.  The sebum produced by the ferret's sebaceous glands
a) adds a slight yellow cast to the fur, b) produces a musty odor, c) will
have an increased production when the skin and fur drys out, d) gives the
fur its sheen, and e) all of the above.  Easy quiz.
 
In terms of neutering to control odor, it will have no difference on the
anal sac or sebaceous gland production of "Pepe La Pew Purfume." When
females go into heat, they have an odor the boys can "follow home," similar
to any Liz Taylor fragrance.  When the males go into rut, they exude an odor
to warn other males, and to make themselves sexy to the females.  Kinda like
"Old Spice," but without the neat bottle.  When you neuter a male or female,
you are removing the parts that make the other parts worthwhile--that is,
the testes and the ovaries--and the body stops thinking it is a sexual
being.  No more ruts, no more heats, no more sexual behaviors.  And no more
sexual smells.  BTW, the only difference between an unneutered male and one
with a vasectomy is the later shoots blanks.  Kind of like a '68 GTO without
gas.  "Bubba Bobbit."
 
The best way I've found to control odor, and look at the FAQ and Bossart's
and Grant's stuff for great ideas, is by frequent cleaning of the bedding
(the sebum rubs off the fur into the bedding), keeping the litter box clean
(Free anal secretions with every poop!), cleaning the ears (dark brown waxy
deposits stink), and brushing the fur (body sees it as grooming, as will the
ferret if done at the right time, and helps to decrease sebum production).
I add vanilla to the bedding when in the dryer, and rub the ferrets with a
vanilla-scented washcloth before visitors come over.  BTW, sebum production
is highest in younger ferrets, and slowly decreases with age.  It slightly
increases in the spring, peaking near summer.  (This the season to be
stinky...did I see Sebum Claus?)
 
Bob and the 13 Sebumites
[Posted in FML issue 1558]