Sukie, I am so sorry about Ruffle.  We all just love our cute little guys so
much - that goes for my cats and dog, too.  Putting my beautiful loyal
golden retriever to sleep 3 years ago after she had heart and kidney failure
at the age of 10 is still something that haunts me.  Yet she had a good
death - because it was painless and I was there to hold her.  So try to
remember that you did everything you possibly could for her, and you gave
her all the love in the world.  Just think how lucky she was to have had you
as her owners.  I think of this everytime I hear about an abused, neglected,
unloved animal -- then I am glad for those of us who love and care for our
precious pets.  Rest in peace knowing you did all the best.
 
Don't know if BIG will permit this, but here is a well-known bit of prose
that helped me.
 
                               A Dog's Prayer
 
Treat me kindly, my beloved master, for no heart in all the world is more
grateful for kindness than the loving heart of me.  Do not break my spirit
with a stick, for your patience and understanding will more quickly teach me
the things you would have me do.
 
Speak to me often, for your voice is the world's sweetest music, as you must
know by the fierce wagging of my tail when your footstep falls upon my
waiting ear.
 
When it is cold and wet, take me inside, for I am now a domesticated animal,
no longer used to bitter elements.  And I ask no greater glory than the
privelege of sitting at your feet.  Though you had no home, I would rather
follow you through ice and snow than rest upon the softest pillow in the
warmest home in all the land, for you are my god and I am your devoted
worshipper.
 
Keep my pan filled with fresh water, for although I should not reproach you
were it dry, I cannot tell you when I suffer thirst.  Feed me clean food,
that I may stay well, to romp and play and do your bidding, to walk by your
side, and stand ready to protect you with my life should your life be in
danger.
 
And, beloved master, should the great Master see fit to deprive me of my
health or sight, do not turn me away from you.  Hold me gently in your arms
as skilled hands grant me the merciful boon of eternal rest--and I will
leave you knowing with the last breath I drew, my fate was ever safest in
your hands.
[Posted in FML issue 1650]