Well, we've done Shakespeare.  For some reason, King James popped into my
head.
 
Behold!  I have for thee a gift, a gift of great joy.  When I spray it upon
thee, thou shalt hate it, and thou willst blame me and ask, "Why hast thou
cursed me such?"  And you will not understand.  When I spray it upon thee,
thou willst believe that it stinketh and thou shalt run in fear.  But
rejoice, for when thine enemy shall lay in wait for thee, she shall attack
thee with great joy, but she shall attack thee only once.  And when she
attacks thee, she shall spit and shake her head and ask, "Why hast thou
smitten me with this horrific taste upon my tongue?" And behold!  Thine
enemy shall attack thee no more, and you, thou biggest man-ferret among
the tiny, little women-ferrets, shall no longer scream like a girl, and
hence we shall call thee Big Sissy Boy no more.
 
Big Boy Translates: Mom sprayed bitter apple on me and now the girls don't
bite me any more.
 
News Flash: Everybody seems to be feeling better and finally are allowed
out to play again.  Although her stools don't really look quite right,
Ruby never had diarrhea, so I suspect she may have been the one to bring
this lovely gift into the house.  I am definitely seeing some green poops,
so maybe this is ECE.  We still have plenty of Pedialite, duck soup and
chicken baby food to go around.  I even broke down and bought the
ingredients to try chicken gravy (and I don't even cook for my human
family, much less cook a dead chicken carcass).  It feels like things are
starting to get back to normal around here.  Thanks again everyone for your
support and advice.
 
Jodie
Ms. Natasha Delilah Weasel Woo:  Aha!  Gotcha!  What the. . . . ECK!
Jewel:  I can walk again!  I can run!  I can dook.  I shall take these
tiny pieces of food, and hide them one by one behind the computer.  No one
will ever know!
Big Boy:  It must be my super powers that made them stop biting me. I'm so
cool.
Ruby:  ACHOO!  'scuse me.
[Posted in FML issue 2738]