OK, so if you are in a restaurant in downtown Istanbul on Thanksgiving
day, just what do you ask the waiter if you want a turkey dinner? You
ask that you want a turkey...in Turkey? No, not really; you have to ask
for turkey by another name, because you could be misunderstood as a
Turk-eating cannibal, or worse. You really don't want to eat a Turk, do
you? And they wouldn't want you to do that either.

So what to do?

I'll tell you what you should do in this situation, at least, from my
prospective, the prospective of Edward Lipinski, a concocter of
LUMPS...and baba hindi for your hungry ferret.

I digress here from the original question of ordering turkey in
downtown Istanbul for this recommendation for feeding your ferret quite
inexpensively by taking advantage of the post holiday supermarket
special reduced pricing of frozen/fresh butterball turkeys.

This is what I do for my pelzartig frettchen* to take advantage of the
Thanksgiving Holiday. I buy low and cook high. For example, on the day
after Thanksgiving, go shopping and buy a whole turkey at a wildly
reduced price. Frozen is best for the purpose I have in mind.

Summon the chief butcher/meat cutter and request that the turkey be
sawed into fist-sized chunks of frozen turkey (T-chunks) and following
that, have the turkey rewrapped in clear packaging material, each one
separate. The separate turkey chunks you should then consign to your
freezer such that you can cook any one T-chunk at a time of your
choosing.

After adding 12 grains of iodized salt to the least amount boiling
water, immerse the T-chunk and boil until meat is soft enough for your
ferret to chew. Keep bone in. And above all, save the soup you've just
cooked and freeze as a superb additive to LUMPS.

For the time being, we will ignore LUMPS, since it is an exhaustive
topic and can be examined at a later time. Suffice it to say here,
however, that LUMPS enables my pelzartig frettchen to eat (and enjoy)
practically any food you can think of.

For those of you who have ferrets with a narrow range of tastes, your
ferret may reject this new food, the T-chunks. I will leave it up to
you to figure out how to expand your ferret's tastes such that this
turkey will certainly enhance your ferret's health. At a later time I
should like provide the processes I use to widen any ferret's
acceptability of an expansive and inexpensive diet.

To return briefly now to the beginning of this posting, let me give
you the benefit of an internet Turkish dictionary site, which defines
the turkey bird, in the Turk language, as baba hindi, or kendini, or
begenmis adam. Perhaps you could use these nouns in the event you wish
to dine on the American bird in uptown Istanbul.

Oh, I've been told by a fellow Turkish folkdancer friend just yesterday
that I should ask for the American bird when in the former Ottoman
Empire, the land of Mustafa Kemal Ataturk . Most Americans are lousy
speakers of Turkish.

Gluecklich Dankfest (G) Happy Thanksgiving

Edward Lipinski, concocter of LUMPS

*pelzartig frettchen (G) furry ferrets

[Posted in FML 6167]