Hi!  This is Tenaka and Cayanne.  We're the Bryan Hall's ferrets.  Well,
we're typing this in because he can't right now.  He's still recovering from
the... well... conversation... we had with him.  Imagine our surprise and
dismay when we found out (we hacked his compooter) that he had thought about
finding us a new home!  Here's a brief summary of the conversation....
 
Tenaka: What's this? <CHOMP!>
 
Bryan: OW!
 
Cayanne: I don't think you understand... <CHOMP!> You are OUR Hooman Bean.
<CHOMP!> We'll let you know when something is wrong.  <CHOMP!> Understand?
<CHOMP!>
 
Bryan: Ow?
 
Tenaka: NOT GOOD ENOUGH!  <CHOMP!> Ya know, Cayanne, I think we are going to
have our paws full with training this Hooman.  maybe we ought to give HIM
some ferretone... it always makes ME feel better.  <CHOMP>
 
Cayanne: I don't think so... but I DO think he's had enough chomping...
NAAAHH!  Just one more... <CHOMP!>
 
Well, as you can see folks, Bryan is going through HIS training period, and
may ask stupid questions periodically.  Please bear with him, as he really
does mean well.  Heck, he was concerned about us, and I can't fault him
about that.
 
Cayanne wants me to ask all you other ferrets out there... what is the best
way to train your Hooman?  Heck, he plays with us three hours a day when he
can, and at least for an hour a day.  He feeds us IAMS kitten food and
always has some ferretone on hand.  One thing we don't like is that he
sprays this really stinky stuff on the corners of the room when he lets us
out of the cage.  It makes me sneeze!  We even had this real neat cardboard
box with holes in it in our cage for awhile until Cayanne pooped in it.
 
Our Hooman has just recovered enough to want to thank everyone for the calls
and the emails, though we had to read them to him.  I think we over-did it a
little.
 
Special thanks go to Special Agent Raiden and Hooman (our Hooman can't
recall your hooman's name cuz he heard it at 4 am and wasn't really awake.
You get special thanks too!) , and to Cheryl Forbis, Dave Hinz, Dawn
Desmarais, Dee McNally, Dodie, J.  Chevere, James Hart, Linda Doran, Pat
Ball, Pat Smith, Edward Swartz, Troy Eckhart, William Killian, and Carrie
Landry for talking some sense into our poor Hooman Bryan.  Rest assured, we
have no intention of going anywhere, and we have been practicing our CHOMP!
in case he gets any more bright ideas.  Any other suggestions you ferrets
have out there for training Hoomans is appreciated.
 
Thanks again for all your help!  And thanks for the people that still are
writing to us.  The more sense we can pound into Bryan, the better trained
we can get him.
 
   Yours,
 
   Tenaka and Cayanne
 
PS.. Our internet address is the same as Bryan's...
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[Posted in FML issue 1663]