Alas you finally hear it.  It's what you've been waiting for!  After
dealing with the banality of the Charmers appearances the time is finally
here to see a REAL event.  The coming of the Oracle.  The skies churn
purple and gray, then twist into a narrow vortex.  Why it's a ...
wormhole!  A flash is seen, and out from the center shoots a red radio
flyer wagon, and billowing blue robes trailing behind from it's pilot.
She zooms over your head leaving an eardrum bursting afterburner.
Shaaaaaaaa-bang.
 
Then a voice shouts out louder than a redneck at a Willie Nelson picnic,
"WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
 
Look closely love puppets ... because a wee thing is at the helm
navigating the craft.  A tiny taupe colored ferret by the name of
Serendipity.  She adjusts her tiny goggles and with a thumbs up, they
swoop over Japan.
 
FO: "Dippy we overshot!  I just wanted to escape the terrible TN storms
and tornadoes, and lay over in Holland for a while.  I left my wooden
shoes, dagnabbit!  They would have been so cool hanging from my rearview
mirror too."
 
D: "Dat's otay!  The Crandall says the race is to go on through the week
and we are to make many passes around the world.  Besides, we had to stop
in Japan first.  They are Sean and Rocky's biggest fans!  Anybody dat's
fans of theirs are okay in my book."
 
FO: "I just gotta get ferret anime stickers for the wagon, Dippy.  I
wanna land and at least get the Japanese Ferret Association's magnet."
 
D: "Bbb ..b..but, the Charmer!"
 
FO: "Pashaw, the Charmer.  She's busy dispensing lifesaver charms and
looking for fuel."
 
As the hovercraft flies down to a lower altitude, the Japanese people
rush to pick up phones to report a falling meteor with a white tail
streaking across the sky.  A trail that is not made of star dust but
are actually Depends blowing off the back of the wagon.
 
FO: "We gotta make an entrance!  Jack it up Dippy!!!!"
 
Echoing through the lower mountains, people in the streets of Tokyo turn
an ear to the skies as they hear Jimmie Hendrix's searing guitar as he
plays the intro to Purple Haze.  Dainty tiny Dippy's head starts head
banging.
 
D: "Purple raisins ... in my head ..."
 
FO: "Dippy!  Purple haze, not raisins.  You don't get high on raisons.
Besides, I think we've heard enough about raisons, mice stuffed raisons,
raison stuffed mice ..."
 
D: "Speak for yourself."
 
FO: "Okay Dippy dude, wave to everyone!"
    ::tiny paw waving::
 
FO: "Hover now .... hold it ... hold it ... wait on it ... wait..."
 
D: "Now?"
 
FO: "Wait on it ... hold it ... steady ..."
 
D: "OKay now?"
 
FO: "Hooooold .... "
 
D: Siiiiigh, "NOW?"
 
FO: "NOW!"
 
A special delivery from Wolfy ... a bag of "thank-you's" is held over
the side of the shiny wagon.  Tiny thank you's scatter and flutter in
the wind, then float down to the gracious people of Japan.  With a
satisfied smile, the Ferret Oracle waves off offers of beans, depends,
'shine, chopsticks, and Saki ... waiwaiwaiwaaaaaait.  Saki?
 
D: "Oracle nooooooo!"
 
FO: "Just a nip for the cold night over Siberia."
 
D: ::mumbling:: "Glad I'm here to navigate .. co-pilot is more like it.."
 
FO: "Huh?  What's that you say?  What?"
 
D: "Oh nuting, I just saying what an honor it is to navigate such a
wonderful pilot like you"
 
FO: "Oh .."
 
The Ferret Oracle pulls out her book for detailed explanations of the
string theory to see if something can be of use ... sigh, she's gonna
have to pull a whole lot of them to catch up the the Charmer.
[Posted in FML issue 5204]